When things go sour.
Nick was a fellow welder turned mate I met whilst working at a wheelchair factory many, many moons ago.

Nick was fucking the bosses daughter. He got his job through the boss-man. Unbeknownst to all of us. He started at the bottom - putting the frames through the chrome bath. That meant wiring them up, dunking them in phosphoric acid and turning on the switch. Then rinsing them afterwards with minimum of mess. Shit work. I knew - I'd done it a couple of years earlier. Fortunately for Nick he showed a modicum of intelligence and just a sparkle of ingenuity. Enough that he started to move up the "ranks" of the factory floor. Until he landed in the cubicle next to me. I'd done up to Cert.8 Mig with the company but got bored of the daily grind, so having a bit of engineering background (a couple of years getting pissed at uni) they teamed me up with the design dept. and I was to build the jigs out of 1/4 inch plate steel for newly designed frames for the rest of the workadays to weld up. Nick joined me within a couple of months of him being there.

One day the bosses princess (who I have to admit was very pleasant to look at - apparently she was a haircut model for haircut magazines amongst other things) came to slum it with the calloused hand mob after she had finished her school day (YES! YOU HEARD ME RIGHT. She was 17 he was 22) and needed to meet daddy before he finished for the day. Normally this involved some friendly banter, maybe a few winks and very rarely a catcall. Not this time. Some of us spied Nick giving her a sly/shy peck on the cheek in the carpark. Within moments of her leaving we had swooped on Nick and got all the relevant details. Been fucking her for a couple of years, her dad gave him the job. Some of us reacted more than others - I remember our foreman John deciding he "never liked the fucking little cunt!" and was "gonna make his life a fucking misery". Me I tried to cast my mind back to some of the after-work drunken pub conversations about "chicks" and whether I had said anything offensive and came up drawing a blank. As it turned out: no.

Nick used to whinge that she was dud root. According to him intercourse consisted of him performing cunnilingus on her for up to 1/2 an hour at which point after her long overdue panting orgasm he was allowed to stick his dick in her vagina for a few minutes until he achieved his own relief. Nick's solution for this unsatisfactory sex life was to eventually decide to go out and fuck some other pretty young thing and break up with the bosses daughter. Now I know mentioned she was a princess, did I also mention she was a fucking psycho bitch?

This story ends; dear reader with a very messy breakup. Following that a few months of weird stalking on the girlfriends behalf and eventually culminating in Nicks's termination from the company due to him being the only person to be chosen for a "random drug test" and failing. That is despite the fact that about 1/3 of us were smokers. And there were at least 2 guys that regularly dealt to everyone (from management to the shop-floor).
(Mr Pleasant, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 8:55, 20 replies)

If I'd managed to lose my job as a consequence of being shit in bed,
I'd have probably made up some story about the boss victimising me, too.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 9:42, closed)

was this in australia?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 10:17, closed)

Kn'oath m8.
How did you guess?
(Mr Pleasant, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 10:21, closed)

there were various clues
#sherlock
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 10:27, closed)

^Don't be so dud root

(Dr Doctor Can't you see I'm burning burning?, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:37, closed)

So let me get this right
The boss gave a job to the bloke who was screwing his underage daughter?
(Smale is stuffed, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 11:28, closed)

Which haircut magazines?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 11:44, closed)

Reminds me of something...
Broke up with my "Queen of The Harpies" gf - "Painya" (you know that 1 truly fucked up relationship you have to have to understand that it was a truly fucked relationship) and the small group of (male) friends who chose her over me including my ex-business partner Dick (couple even fucked her - mmmm... slops, but already knowing what a fucked up bitch she could be my only question is "Why?").
A jizz-monkey - "Dumpster" moved in with me (gotta pay the rent... or not as was the case) who then did a runner aided by Dick.
My besty Ron-as-in-Later (that was his nom de plume) then took it upon himself to nick Dick's massive pot plant as revenge for seeing his mate so royally fucked over. He then slowly sold me large bags of that stuff over several months for a very small financial outlay (I'm talking silver coins - asked no questions, he told me no lies). Ron only told me that a few years ago. He died last Dec. I miss you mate.
So - Dick I enjoyed smoking all your pot you wanker. Cheers fuck-knuckle. I hope to god you still have the misfortune of being Painya's friend/wanna-be fuck buddy (she never liked the fatties btw).
Names changed cause I put a shit-load of sugar in Dumpster's bike tank & happily watched the business I'd built up (without a lot of Dick's help) crumble to not-very much AFTER he'd bought me out.

WOW! That was so puerile. Nice & cathartic.
(bunch of fuking queers v2.1v2.1v2.1v2.1v2.1v2.1v2.1v2.1v2.1v2.1v2.1v2.1v2, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:14, closed)

bloobloobloo

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:47, closed)

Why would you do that to someone? What the hell is wrong with you?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:14, closed)

alright one of dozer's sock puppets

(Dr Doctor Can't you see I'm burning burning?, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:38, closed)

I remember this post from 3 years back
http://b3ta.com/questions/lastlaugh/post1069474
( eXOBeX, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 10:32, closed)

I need a fresh lime and soda.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:33, closed)