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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
( , Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
( , Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Fucking Pointless.
The IT Bods have given me a new phone. Now when it rings, picking it up is not enough, I have to then press a button before it connects too. What the fuck is the point of that? Phones work perfectly well - they ring, you pick them up, you speak. Why did anyone think there was any need to introduce another step into that process? Fucks sake.
What has made you feel like Victor Meldrew recently?
Alt: I'm going round hunting for the Faberge Eggs on 'The Great Easter Egg Hunt' in my spare time. What activity made you realise you may as well come out of the closet and be done with it?
AltAlt: Being Human is fucking brilliant, isn't it? (or have I just provided another answer to my own Alt?).
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:32, 193 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
The IT Bods have given me a new phone. Now when it rings, picking it up is not enough, I have to then press a button before it connects too. What the fuck is the point of that? Phones work perfectly well - they ring, you pick them up, you speak. Why did anyone think there was any need to introduce another step into that process? Fucks sake.
What has made you feel like Victor Meldrew recently?
Alt: I'm going round hunting for the Faberge Eggs on 'The Great Easter Egg Hunt' in my spare time. What activity made you realise you may as well come out of the closet and be done with it?
AltAlt: Being Human is fucking brilliant, isn't it? (or have I just provided another answer to my own Alt?).
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:32, 193 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
you probably have a new phone system, most likely cos your company is expanding or sharing lines
if you're too fat and lazy to push a button you don't deserve to live
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:37, Reply)
if you're too fat and lazy to push a button you don't deserve to live
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:37, Reply)
problem is his fat fingers, he ends up mashing the entire keypad instead of answering
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:38, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:38, Reply)
they have special phones with big buttons for fat people these days
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:41, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:41, Reply)
Can you order one for me Quints?
My fat mouth won't make the words properly.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:46, Reply)
My fat mouth won't make the words properly.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:46, Reply)
We have just installed a new embossing machine at my work
It's faster and better than the old one. However, we've had so many teething problems with it that more than one person has used the older one, just because we know it will work. Utterly mental.
Alt: The fact that I like musicals.
Alt Alt: Yes, although I've not seen last nights episode yet.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:38, Reply)
It's faster and better than the old one. However, we've had so many teething problems with it that more than one person has used the older one, just because we know it will work. Utterly mental.
Alt: The fact that I like musicals.
Alt Alt: Yes, although I've not seen last nights episode yet.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:38, Reply)
ive been saying for years now that a bunch of us should go west end and see a show.
I don't get why I dont go more often, I love a good show.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:13, Reply)
I don't get why I dont go more often, I love a good show.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:13, Reply)
They've done it on purpose just to make your life more difficult.
That's the way we work, you see.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:40, Reply)
That's the way we work, you see.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:40, Reply)
And you wonder why you get 'Why won't my phone work?' questions...
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:47, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:47, Reply)
Although I hasten to add, I did not bother them with such a ridiculous, stupid question.
I asked my colleague who sits next to me.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:48, Reply)
I would like to participate in this thread
not least so you don't feel like a hopeless failure, however I have little to add.
I'm dying my hair later.
/dull and pointless.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:40, Reply)
not least so you don't feel like a hopeless failure, however I have little to add.
I'm dying my hair later.
/dull and pointless.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:40, Reply)
Nope, a quick shave of the sides and some lovely red dye.
Ah the joys of stable employment.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:43, Reply)
Ah the joys of stable employment.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:43, Reply)
Continued letting the sides grow out and left it a natural brown.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:47, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:47, Reply)
My hair if not quite as bad as foxtrot's
but it has it's moments, you've seen pics, I assume.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:49, Reply)
but it has it's moments, you've seen pics, I assume.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:49, Reply)
because being unemployed with brown hair is easier than your boss thinking your a dick and that he made a mistake keeping you on?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:48, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:48, Reply)
hey kids I'm all alternative and I can make the fricking tea AWESUM !!!!!
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:50, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:50, Reply)
My hair has been silly colours and styles in this job many times
They never cared, it just happened to be brown when the redundancies hit so I left off shaving the sides for a few weeks, in anticipation of job interviews.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:51, Reply)
They never cared, it just happened to be brown when the redundancies hit so I left off shaving the sides for a few weeks, in anticipation of job interviews.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:51, Reply)
i'm glad you have seen the error of your ways, grown up and decided not to be a muppet and dye your hair silly, unproffessional colours
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:54, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:54, Reply)
Sorry to disappoint Quents
I like being a Muppet, you see and intend to keep it up as long as it continues to amuse me.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:56, Reply)
I like being a Muppet, you see and intend to keep it up as long as it continues to amuse me.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:56, Reply)
your P45 will forever hang over your head like the sword of damocles
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:09, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:09, Reply)
Not in this company.
One of the reasons I like them is they are quite happy with me as I am.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:17, Reply)
One of the reasons I like them is they are quite happy with me as I am.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:17, Reply)
Every time I get behind the wheel of my car
I turn into the most annoyed, grumpy bastard ever. I'm sure it's not my fault - every other driver seems determined to be on a collision course with me. My wife is utterly unsympathetic and I worry that my son is learning bad habits from me.
Alt: My love of 60s girl groups is a bit gay.
Altalt: TV? Yawn...
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:44, Reply)
I turn into the most annoyed, grumpy bastard ever. I'm sure it's not my fault - every other driver seems determined to be on a collision course with me. My wife is utterly unsympathetic and I worry that my son is learning bad habits from me.
Alt: My love of 60s girl groups is a bit gay.
Altalt: TV? Yawn...
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:44, Reply)
It's properly dead round here today, no?
No thread breaking the 100 replies mark?
Did everybody flounce and I missed it?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:01, Reply)
No thread breaking the 100 replies mark?
Did everybody flounce and I missed it?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:01, Reply)
Fuck off Hippy.
do I even need to say this any more, or can we just take it as read?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:18, Reply)
do I even need to say this any more, or can we just take it as read?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:18, Reply)
Ever since you said you wouldn't be on here so much after being caught out at work
People have been staying away out of solidarity with you.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:21, Reply)
People have been staying away out of solidarity with you.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:21, Reply)
I knew it!
I was the only one that kept this place ticking over. I'd do it subtley, so you'd think it was almost anyone but me, but I was the heartbeat really.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:22, Reply)
I was the only one that kept this place ticking over. I'd do it subtley, so you'd think it was almost anyone but me, but I was the heartbeat really.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:22, Reply)
AltAlt: No.
The first two series were great. Then it turned bad. It's now shit and doesn't even have Aidan Turner in it anymore to make it worth watching.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:03, Reply)
The first two series were great. Then it turned bad. It's now shit and doesn't even have Aidan Turner in it anymore to make it worth watching.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:03, Reply)
who watches that tv show PointlesS?
It was right good in the first series, but now people are actually winning it and its shit
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:13, Reply)
It was right good in the first series, but now people are actually winning it and its shit
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:13, Reply)
i catch the last five minutes
i like how its always 'name 4 lepers from mogadishu whose left nipples are pierced' and everyone goes, erm, erm, frank? john? lenny?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:23, Reply)
i like how its always 'name 4 lepers from mogadishu whose left nipples are pierced' and everyone goes, erm, erm, frank? john? lenny?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:23, Reply)
i threw a punch at somebody once
the rest of the party was a bit of a downer TBH
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:28, Reply)
the rest of the party was a bit of a downer TBH
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:28, Reply)
I used to be a driving instructor and had to fail
the last leper pupil I had. He left his foot on the accelerator.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:30, Reply)
the last leper pupil I had. He left his foot on the accelerator.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:30, Reply)
A leper once said to me
FUCKING HELL I'M BORED! WHERE IS EVERYONE?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:35, Reply)
FUCKING HELL I'M BORED! WHERE IS EVERYONE?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:35, Reply)
That naked fucking ape cunt talking about broken fucking bones and all
I think ive just broken my bloody toe
i blame him
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:36, Reply)
I think ive just broken my bloody toe
i blame him
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:36, Reply)
www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-17178014
what use is a 41MP camera when your eyes only see about 20 Mega Pixels?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:51, Reply)
You can blow up the image to enormous sizes without loss of quality
also your eyes don't see in pixels unless you are Kroney
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:52, Reply)
also your eyes don't see in pixels unless you are Kroney
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:52, Reply)
no but is the equivalent, altho i just found a website that says we see in like 500MP
so fuck that
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:52, Reply)
so fuck that
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:52, Reply)
i have just had coffe, maybe I should have more
It's probably the excel reporting tool I'm building that's sucking the life out of me today
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:22, Reply)
It's probably the excel reporting tool I'm building that's sucking the life out of me today
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:22, Reply)
Anyway, megapixels aren't the be all and end all of image quality
the sensor size and quality are also vital, not to mention the lens etc
/cavy
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:57, Reply)
the sensor size and quality are also vital, not to mention the lens etc
/cavy
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:57, Reply)
What is it with you two?
Cavy was the other one with a Pixies lyric in her sig.
*narrows eyes*
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:01, Reply)
Cavy was the other one with a Pixies lyric in her sig.
*narrows eyes*
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:01, Reply)
No idea, haven't "seen" her here in ages
Also I'm not really a massive pixies fan, so would'nt notice anyone elses sig anyway
*shrugs*
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:02, Reply)
Also I'm not really a massive pixies fan, so would'nt notice anyone elses sig anyway
*shrugs*
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:02, Reply)
shurrup you, i was talking in like a literal sense
your eyes have only so much quality, its like games and stuff with 60+ FPS when you only see about 24
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:01, Reply)
your eyes have only so much quality, its like games and stuff with 60+ FPS when you only see about 24
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:01, Reply)
Technology still hasn't found a way to stop me from taking shit pictures.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:04, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:04, Reply)
Good pictures are very much driven by the photographer and i hope always will be
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:06, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:06, Reply)
Do I?
Do do do, dooby do dooby do do do di di di diddly do I eye eye eye?
I don't know how to write scat.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:13, Reply)
Do do do, dooby do dooby do do do di di di diddly do I eye eye eye?
I don't know how to write scat.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:13, Reply)
I'd rather be a camel.
I'd like to be able to eat and drink shit loads in one day and then forget about eating for the rest of the month. I'd also like to be able to spend one day out of a month just going to the toilet and emptying my bowels/bladder and then not have to do it again for a month. Camels can't do this, but if they could they would be able to conquer the world.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:15, Reply)
I'd like to be able to eat and drink shit loads in one day and then forget about eating for the rest of the month. I'd also like to be able to spend one day out of a month just going to the toilet and emptying my bowels/bladder and then not have to do it again for a month. Camels can't do this, but if they could they would be able to conquer the world.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:15, Reply)
I think your problem is that you have too many cats and live in Coventry
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:17, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:17, Reply)
I'm confused
Warwick University is in Coventry. Is Coventry Uni not therefore somewhere else?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:23, Reply)
Warwick University is in Coventry. Is Coventry Uni not therefore somewhere else?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:23, Reply)
No
Come on Badgo, you're a scientist. It is not logical to draw that conclusion.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:24, Reply)
Come on Badgo, you're a scientist. It is not logical to draw that conclusion.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:24, Reply)
got in the way of an undercut penalty corner strike
didn't get my stick up fast enough. Clean broke my left ulna about a third of the way up my arm.
apparently it's only 20% displaced so should heal OK. Stuck in plaster for 6 weeks though, gutted.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:31, Reply)
didn't get my stick up fast enough. Clean broke my left ulna about a third of the way up my arm.
apparently it's only 20% displaced so should heal OK. Stuck in plaster for 6 weeks though, gutted.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:31, Reply)
depends which day it is. it's all about the wanking variety.
but it's my left arm and I'm right handed.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:34, Reply)
but it's my left arm and I'm right handed.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:34, Reply)
Ah but the University of Cumbria
is based in Lancashire, and Oxford Brooks is in Oxford but not part of Oxford University... its a crazy fucked up world
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:38, Reply)
is based in Lancashire, and Oxford Brooks is in Oxford but not part of Oxford University... its a crazy fucked up world
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:38, Reply)
University of Central Lancashire tried to market itself as "UCL"
understandably, UCL itself got a little upset.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:46, Reply)
understandably, UCL itself got a little upset.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:46, Reply)
And its in fucking Preston of all the inbreed northern shite holes
It is just Preston Poly.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)
It is just Preston Poly.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)
how do i get google streetview to stop making me stare at the ground like a sulky teenager?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:20, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:20, Reply)
thx have you got their number?
i can't help it, i'll be like walking down the street and then you run out of circle cursor bits and the cursor goes square, so your only option is to zoom, and once you've zoomed its difficulter to turn, and every time you turn you zoom in more and it gets even harder
and then you just go outside and look at your house anyway
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:26, Reply)
i can't help it, i'll be like walking down the street and then you run out of circle cursor bits and the cursor goes square, so your only option is to zoom, and once you've zoomed its difficulter to turn, and every time you turn you zoom in more and it gets even harder
and then you just go outside and look at your house anyway
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:26, Reply)
aww man, why didn't i think of that?
EDIT AAAARGH, no phone number on their contact page, the BASTARDS
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:27, Reply)
EDIT AAAARGH, no phone number on their contact page, the BASTARDS
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:27, Reply)
like that time ross had a sandwich with "moist maker" in and it was eaten by his boss and he got rage
and had to rescue the babe in the tower from David Bowie by finding his way through some sort of maze?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:28, Reply)
and had to rescue the babe in the tower from David Bowie by finding his way through some sort of maze?
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:28, Reply)
nononnononon, nothing like that
this is more like the time ross rolls over in the planetarium and theres a squirt sound and rachel goes 'aww, it's ok,' but then he replies 'HE COMES...' and Zalgo reaps their souls for the underworld
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:30, Reply)
this is more like the time ross rolls over in the planetarium and theres a squirt sound and rachel goes 'aww, it's ok,' but then he replies 'HE COMES...' and Zalgo reaps their souls for the underworld
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:30, Reply)
This has me crying with laughter at my desk
soundcloud.com/vaughan-1-1/this-is-what-crazy-looks-like?utm_sou
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:40, Reply)
soundcloud.com/vaughan-1-1/this-is-what-crazy-looks-like?utm_sou
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:40, Reply)
i'm happy with this as a summary
but i have 5 minutes til home and i want something to do
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:51, Reply)
but i have 5 minutes til home and i want something to do
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:51, Reply)
May I recommend
trying a Hutchence?
Or the slightly newer version the Carradine which is the same but in a wardrobe
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:54, Reply)
trying a Hutchence?
Or the slightly newer version the Carradine which is the same but in a wardrobe
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:54, Reply)
Send Sasha a creepy text.
Then cry because Sasha is figment of your imagination.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:55, Reply)
Then cry because Sasha is figment of your imagination.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:55, Reply)
SHE IS NOT
we chatted on facebook the other day, she's lovely but we had tracey abck for a day and she's lovely too and she's sasha's mate
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:56, Reply)
we chatted on facebook the other day, she's lovely but we had tracey abck for a day and she's lovely too and she's sasha's mate
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:56, Reply)
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:59, Reply)
after a bit of a walk and a little sit down I've got my phone out to reply yo this with
" :( "
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:24, Reply)
" :( "
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:24, Reply)
Your posts regularly have me crying at my desk.
Not with laughter, though.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)
Not with laughter, though.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)
I'm afraid I am the real one.
I know you prefer the other one. Soz.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:52, Reply)
I know you prefer the other one. Soz.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:52, Reply)
Seeing wittier, more succesfull and better looking people post can be upsetting
but you shouldn't let it get to you. look at what you do have...
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:57, Reply)
but you shouldn't let it get to you. look at what you do have...
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:57, Reply)
Oh God don't tell me you've developed a stammer too?
Heaven help us.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:06, Reply)
Heaven help us.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:06, Reply)
Briefly scanning todays efforts
may I say that
a) you are bunch of tedious dullards and
b) that you should delete your accounts and kill yourselves?
Thank you
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:06, Reply)
may I say that
a) you are bunch of tedious dullards and
b) that you should delete your accounts and kill yourselves?
Thank you
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:06, Reply)
Isn't time you went and dyed your hair again?
Perhaps you could kill yourself at the same time by drinking industrial quantities of hair dye.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:08, Reply)
Perhaps you could kill yourself at the same time by drinking industrial quantities of hair dye.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:08, Reply)
It's official: I need to be more of a cunt
I've just had a student cancel on me at 45 minutes' notice. Could really have done without that, especially having found out today that my finances are somewhat "Montied."
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:08, Reply)
I've just had a student cancel on me at 45 minutes' notice. Could really have done without that, especially having found out today that my finances are somewhat "Montied."
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:08, Reply)
You massive gayer.
Are you hunting them so you can shove them up your arse?
If so, it's the most middle class love eggs evar.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:13, Reply)
Are you hunting them so you can shove them up your arse?
If so, it's the most middle class love eggs evar.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:13, Reply)
Nothing's made me feel like Victor Meldrew lately.
Fulham won their biggest game of the season on Saturday, I had an amazing Saturday night at Scala in Kings Cross, got talking to a girl who turns out is absolutely ace and she's from Newcastle and will be up next weekend. Also my mum's in town for the next couple days and we spent all afternoon walking round the good bits of town and in the art galleries. Taking her out for a slap up meal in a couple hours.
LIFE IS GOOD.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:19, Reply)
Fulham won their biggest game of the season on Saturday, I had an amazing Saturday night at Scala in Kings Cross, got talking to a girl who turns out is absolutely ace and she's from Newcastle and will be up next weekend. Also my mum's in town for the next couple days and we spent all afternoon walking round the good bits of town and in the art galleries. Taking her out for a slap up meal in a couple hours.
LIFE IS GOOD.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:19, Reply)
I have a few, I need more.
Oliver Spencer is getting raided for my birthday next week.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:31, Reply)
Oliver Spencer is getting raided for my birthday next week.
( , Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:31, Reply)
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