WELL THIS IS FUN
What are you cunts up to this week?

It's my birthday on Thursday. I'm having foods bought for me. Ha! Gutted. I win. I am also out drinking on Friday. Tonight, eh, not sure. Might watch some telly or something.

Alt: Talk amongst yourselves, what am I, your mother?
( Kroney, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:30, 99 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

This is going well.

( Kroney, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:32, Reply)

Everyone has gone to the sandwich van to buy some botulism

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:34, Reply)

I've got fuck all planned except writing angry letters.
Mainly about council tax banding, 4 people in my block are band b, and me and 10 others are band c, I sent a letter saying, they should have changed all the bands to b when they changed those 4 individual flats. I got one back saying. Oh no you're definatly c, we just made 4 mistakes in the past.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:34, Reply)

And I can't appeal, so I might write to my mp or something.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:34, Reply)

also have some erotic fiction (text)
but be aware of the stonk on you'll get.
t.co/xbYA2dcX
(PsychoChomp, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:36, Reply)

Oh boy! Can that Apeloverage write.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:41, Reply)

I like the thought of an unbelievably average body.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:43, Reply)

I liked "hooha getting right slimy"

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:45, Reply)

No he can't.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:43, Reply)

Haha
That is brilliant. Where can I read the rest?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:44, Reply)

W.....T......F......?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:47, Reply)

Pizza this evening, back to Newcastle tomorrow. Out tomorrow for a night I've been meaning to go to for ages.
Then taking a girl out Friday. Go me.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:38, Reply)

How long you back in Newcastle for Baz?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:44, Reply)

Erm the 15th is the latest.
Cos I'm going to Spain on the 16th.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:46, Reply)

Fancy a pint?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:47, Reply)

Certainly.
When are you free?
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:58, Reply)

12th, 14th or 15th June?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:02, Reply)

Call it the 12th as I might be leaving earlier than the 15th.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:04, Reply)

Cool

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:33, Reply)

Not a lot.
it's my birthday tomorrow, but I have no plans, something that surprises people and their surprise annoys me. other than that I am seeing 2 different shrinks to see if I think they will be any good at curing my current gloomyness.

not a great week.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 29 May 2012, 12:39, Reply)

Yeah, people are surprised that I didn't have plans too.
Mid week birthdays suck, especially when all your mates are stay-at-home couples. Herding cats ain't in it.

Still, free food!
( Kroney, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:41, Reply)

I just can't be bothered/not in the mood ATM
I'll do something is a few weeks or when I fell like it. I don't see the day as significant, it's just an excuse, at best.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 29 May 2012, 12:56, Reply)

Have you tried cheering the fuck up?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:44, Reply)

He should buy himself an ipad

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:50, Reply)

I can't afford an iPad
I am now sad
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:55, Reply)

iSad

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:58, Reply)

iSad 2

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:01, Reply)

That's where I went wrong, I got an Android Tablet instead.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 29 May 2012, 12:56, Reply)

Most users with an android tablet purposely ride under a lorry due to the crushing depression
Someone should tell Boris that before he fucks around with the bow roundabout
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:59, Reply)

I must have problems
You are really making me laugh today, that normally never happens.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 29 May 2012, 13:12, Reply)

Yep, it didn't work so well.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 29 May 2012, 12:56, Reply)

Have you tried telling yourself a joke?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:51, Reply)

No one knows you like yourself

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:51, Reply)

A bird in hand is better than two in the bush

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:52, Reply)

Pull yourself together

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:52, Reply)

Thanks Rory
That has actually made me do an office-LOL.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 29 May 2012, 12:57, Reply)

Have you tried gazzing Rory for some counselling?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:53, Reply)

I've only got half an half to save this mans life damnit, after that I'm off to lunch and he can fuck himself

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:56, Reply)

That should be long enough
If you can't sort him out by lunchtime, I'd say he is beyond hope.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:59, Reply)

I'm watching people eat pizza
through binoculars
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:40, Reply)

You'll probably have to turn them the other way round.
because
they're
fat
(PsychoChomp, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:41, Reply)

No, it's just a really big banjolele
Edit: No wait, small. Small banjolele. Yes.
( Kroney, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:41, Reply)

haha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:45, Reply)

I'm going to Symphony Hall in Birmingham tonight
To see a new live score for the 1939 silent film Dracula, performed by its composer, Philip Glass and The Kronos Quartet.

Alt: Mum? What are you doing on here?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:43, Reply)

That sounds splendid

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:44, Reply)

As long as he has great seats

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:45, Reply)

I have the cheapest seats
Right up in the eaves of Symphony Hall.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:50, Reply)

The Wonderstuff's etc.......

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:50, Reply)

I'm very excited.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:45, Reply)

Just a thought, 1939? Do you mean 1929?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:49, Reply)

Possibly
I'm more about the music than the film.

EDIT: 1931 according to the internet.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:51, Reply)

Should be good, that's the best Dracula film ever.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:54, Reply)

I've seen live scores performed before and it is usually really good.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:57, Reply)

No, that was Blade 3.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:00, Reply)

Wouldn't that make the composer over 90?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:20, Reply)

I think Philip Glass is in his 70s
However this is a new score, composed recently.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:24, Reply)

THAT'S THE JO-
actually I missed that first time round.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:26, Reply)

I am off into town to purchase a ring for Mrs Cow's 40th birthday
I am also off on holiday on Saturday for a week! Woop!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:46, Reply)

cock?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:50, Reply)

THAT@S ME!
Dunno as yet. Something nice
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:52, Reply)

get something with dolphins

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:10, Reply)

A squirrel bumming a unicorn was what I was aiming for

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:12, Reply)

You can order Elizabeth Duke stuff online now.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:13, Reply)

The elbow in YM
The weekend is more what I'm looking forward to, got a beer festival on Saturday, possible beach trip on sunday, if not a BBQ with some b3tans, then I'm off to Leeds for a couple of days.

Alt: I ordered a tent off Amazon on Friday, and selected free next day delivery, meaning I should have received it yesterday. I didn't receive the package, nor any indication that it wasn't coming. To add to that, it's just arrived and the box it has been delivered in has been torn apart. Think I should complain?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 29 May 2012, 12:59, Reply)

Yes.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:01, Reply)

If this was facebook I'd 'like' that he's now homeless

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:02, Reply)

I don't see how complaining about being homeless to Amazon will help matters

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:03, Reply)

In an odd twist of fate, it's actually a tent that I ordered.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:05, Reply)

Rory must be psychic.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:06, Reply)

Could someone tell me how to get to the restaurant from Oxford Circus this evening?
I can't get to a laptop between now and then to check.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:06, Reply)

surely you are on one right now...

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:06, Reply)

or you know, a smartphone, capable of looking up routes etc

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:44, Reply)

Follow the line of elephants and clowns.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:07, Reply)

this joke works on two levels, well done

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:09, Reply)

He's very witty.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:10, Reply)

so i've heard
from him
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:12, Reply)

Do you find it charming when he tells you?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:14, Reply)

Second to the right and then straight on 'til morning.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:07, Reply)

That takes you to Great Ormond Street.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:14, Reply)

All I know is that it's in Hoxton
If that's any help. At all. Which it isn't.

You'd be best served gazzing the popular kids, they'll know where it is.
( Kroney, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:18, Reply)

Hilariously, I've forgotten what the fucking place is called.

( Kroney, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:24, Reply)

Pizza Hut

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:24, Reply)

Oxford Circus - Liverpool St - Whitechapel - Hoxton
Or Oxford Circus - Embankment - Whitechapel - Hoxton.
(berk, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:19, Reply)

Nice one.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:23, Reply)

Or the Number 26 from Liverpool Street

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:24, Reply)

or the Megabus from Victoria

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:28, Reply)

Head east on Oxford street and keep heading east when it becomes the Clerkenwell Road
and then on to Old Street then left onto the Hackney Road.

It's a long walk though.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:23, Reply)

Am I fuck walking.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:34, Reply)

I'm going for pizza tonight
and then nowt for the rest of the week. Might go to Needoos Thursday or Friday since it's just around the corner.

I finally got round to moving the money from my house sale out of my current account so now when I go to the cashpoint my account balance isn't nearly as entertaining. :(
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:18, Reply)

Having a One Account makes getting your balance at a cashpoint very disturbing

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:23, Reply)

£100,000 overdrawn?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:25, Reply)

This^

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:25, Reply)

When I set up the new account for it online I had to say where the initial deposit was from
I was tempted to select "Other" and then put "Military Coup".
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:27, Reply)

'nazi gold'

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:29, Reply)

'payment for bumhole pictures'

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:31, Reply)

Well I have to have a meeting with the school I want to send my kid to this year
and I am also sorting my will, so I think you will find that I win as my week sounds infinitely more fun and exciting than yours.
( Peej, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:31, Reply)

your wife is going to kill you and marry the oven glove

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:45, Reply)

At least I have something to look forward to then

( Peej, Tue 29 May 2012, 13:47, Reply)

100

(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Tue 29 May 2012, 14:40, Reply)