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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
( , Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
( , Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Life is shit and then you die.
Discuss.
Alt: something about food.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:33, 264 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
Discuss.
Alt: something about food.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:33, 264 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
Life is what you make it
Sometimes it IS fucking shit, but other times it is brilliant
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:35, Reply)
Sometimes it IS fucking shit, but other times it is brilliant
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:35, Reply)
Also:
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
:o)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:36, Reply)
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
:o)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:36, Reply)
life is shit and then you become demented and it gets even shitter
and then you die ten years later
the end
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:37, Reply)
and then you die ten years later
the end
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:37, Reply)
I hadn't thought it like that before
Shit, you're right.
You've ruined my day now!
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:37, Reply)
Shit, you're right.
You've ruined my day now!
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:37, Reply)
Life is great, very enjoyable.
This Prozac is the bollocks!
I had vegi filo pastry thing for dinner, with veg and fruit to follow. I'm becoming rather healthy.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:42, Reply)
This Prozac is the bollocks!
I had vegi filo pastry thing for dinner, with veg and fruit to follow. I'm becoming rather healthy.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:42, Reply)
There is no meaning to life.
Therefore, that grants you the freedom to find or make your own.
Also, I pity the person sat next to me. I just had egg mayonnaise sandwiches for lunch.
*parp*
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:45, Reply)
Therefore, that grants you the freedom to find or make your own.
Also, I pity the person sat next to me. I just had egg mayonnaise sandwiches for lunch.
*parp*
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:45, Reply)
It is, and you do.
What is worse - bad things happening to good people, or good things happening to bad people?
Alt: just had some yummy poached eggs on toast.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:46, Reply)
What is worse - bad things happening to good people, or good things happening to bad people?
Alt: just had some yummy poached eggs on toast.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:46, Reply)
Poached eggs on toast is fucking awesome
Loads of salt and pepper
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:02, Reply)
Loads of salt and pepper
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:02, Reply)
Life is certainly a bitch.
What comfort food can I have for dinner that is easy to make. I was thinking mac and cheese?
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:47, Reply)
What comfort food can I have for dinner that is easy to make. I was thinking mac and cheese?
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:47, Reply)
Boiled eggs for me.
Love 'em. With buttered white bread soldiers. Oh man...
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:49, Reply)
Love 'em. With buttered white bread soldiers. Oh man...
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:49, Reply)
Much as this pains me to type
Vipros idea of using Marmite on your soldiers works for getting salty, eggy goodness in each bite
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:58, Reply)
Vipros idea of using Marmite on your soldiers works for getting salty, eggy goodness in each bite
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:58, Reply)
Mashed potato mixed with cheese
Cheese on top and baked in the oven. NOM!!!!!
My lunch was slightly less good. Chicken salad thing with a maple syrup based dressing I invented this morning
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:53, Reply)
Cheese on top and baked in the oven. NOM!!!!!
My lunch was slightly less good. Chicken salad thing with a maple syrup based dressing I invented this morning
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:53, Reply)
*ponders*
This does seem like an excellent plan. See, this is how depression is stopped. Mashed potato with cheese makes everyone smile (apart from the lactose intolerant)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:58, Reply)
This does seem like an excellent plan. See, this is how depression is stopped. Mashed potato with cheese makes everyone smile (apart from the lactose intolerant)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:58, Reply)
I don't like messing about with extra ingrediants in my food too much.
I'm a bit of a purist. Butter and salt are enough.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:00, Reply)
I'm a bit of a purist. Butter and salt are enough.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:00, Reply)
But the mustard goes with the sausages!
And it makes the cheese taste cheesier!
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:01, Reply)
And it makes the cheese taste cheesier!
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:01, Reply)
Life is pretty great - it just has the habit of chucking shitty bits in every now and then.
It's sort of like taking a nice walk in the country - unless you keep an eye out for cowpats, you're going to get shitty shoes.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:49, Reply)
It's sort of like taking a nice walk in the country - unless you keep an eye out for cowpats, you're going to get shitty shoes.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:49, Reply)
And frankly, I'd rather take in the sights and occassionally walk in some shit, then spend my time staring at the ground trying to avoid it and missing everything else.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:05, Reply)
Life's great. And then you find yourself sitting next to the bastard eating egg mayonaise sandwiches.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:04, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:04, Reply)
It was fucking shit wasn't it?
I won't ever blame anyone for missing a penalty, so I have no problem with Ashley Young for that. It's being utterly ineffectual for the previous 4 games that makes me hate him. How it is possible to be the worst player in any team that features James Milner is beyond me.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:07, Reply)
CORRECTAMUNDO!
Cress and egg mayo is the most pointless double-act since Des and Mel.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:07, Reply)
Cress and egg mayo is the most pointless double-act since Des and Mel.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:07, Reply)
I just finished a shit book someone got me for a present
and it ended on a cliffhanger leading to another book. I'm not happy about this. I didn't even want that book, it was a different book I wanted.
Alt: I ordered a chinese last night and they charge for delivery, but the pizza and kebab place doesn't and the food is cheaper. The delivery person seemed really put out that they had to root through the change in their pockets for my £1.50 change. I've already payed the fuckers for delivery I'm not tipping some cretin for knowing how to a) use a sat nav and b) do their job.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:06, Reply)
and it ended on a cliffhanger leading to another book. I'm not happy about this. I didn't even want that book, it was a different book I wanted.
Alt: I ordered a chinese last night and they charge for delivery, but the pizza and kebab place doesn't and the food is cheaper. The delivery person seemed really put out that they had to root through the change in their pockets for my £1.50 change. I've already payed the fuckers for delivery I'm not tipping some cretin for knowing how to a) use a sat nav and b) do their job.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:06, Reply)
It's the latest James Patterson opus
Ribs in Kung Po sauce, sweet and sour pork HK style, chicken balls, noodles, curry sauce and rice
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:09, Reply)
Ribs in Kung Po sauce, sweet and sour pork HK style, chicken balls, noodles, curry sauce and rice
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:09, Reply)
That's a lot of chinese food.
You fat bastard.
Also, James Patterson? You deserve it for reading that crap. I downloaded a bunch of them for my Grandma and skim read a few to check they were alright. Utter, utter crap.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:10, Reply)
You fat bastard.
Also, James Patterson? You deserve it for reading that crap. I downloaded a bunch of them for my Grandma and skim read a few to check they were alright. Utter, utter crap.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:10, Reply)
that's not the real barry, its a hilarious fake account
set up because the real barry is a tea leaf
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:19, Reply)
set up because the real barry is a tea leaf
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:19, Reply)
he stole all of monty's drugs
and scarpe's booze, its the real reason he had to give up in the first place
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:21, Reply)
and scarpe's booze, its the real reason he had to give up in the first place
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:21, Reply)
did he? what a prick
no-one realises that barry's doing a service here, he was helping monty out with his crippling addiction to cracks and lemon whizzers
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:23, Reply)
no-one realises that barry's doing a service here, he was helping monty out with his crippling addiction to cracks and lemon whizzers
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:23, Reply)
this stream of consciousness, both in content, style and almost correct spelling, has convinced me. barry 2 is AL!
I just finished a shit book someone got me for a present
and it ended on a cliffhanger leading to another book. I'm not happy about this. I didn't even want that book, it was a different book I wanted.
Alt: I ordered a chinese last night and they charge for delivery, but the pizza and kebab place doesn't and the food is cheaper. The delivery person seemed really put out that they had to root through the change in their pockets for my £1.50 change. I've already payed the fuckers for delivery I'm not tipping some cretin for knowing how to a) use a sat nav and b) do their job.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:19, Reply)
I just finished a shit book someone got me for a present
and it ended on a cliffhanger leading to another book. I'm not happy about this. I didn't even want that book, it was a different book I wanted.
Alt: I ordered a chinese last night and they charge for delivery, but the pizza and kebab place doesn't and the food is cheaper. The delivery person seemed really put out that they had to root through the change in their pockets for my £1.50 change. I've already payed the fuckers for delivery I'm not tipping some cretin for knowing how to a) use a sat nav and b) do their job.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:19, Reply)
I didn't have chinese last night
I made spanish style Monkfish tails.
Monkfish is not as impressive as I was hoping it would be. I felt let down.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:20, Reply)
I made spanish style Monkfish tails.
Monkfish is not as impressive as I was hoping it would be. I felt let down.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:20, Reply)
I had chinese last ngiht
and saturday, and for lunch today
different chineses obviously, and homemade too
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:21, Reply)
and saturday, and for lunch today
different chineses obviously, and homemade too
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:21, Reply)
Yeah, and it's a bit of a faff to prepare.
I expected so much, I've been waiting literally years to try it. And it was so very "meh". So I had a cornetto for afters.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:22, Reply)
I expected so much, I've been waiting literally years to try it. And it was so very "meh". So I had a cornetto for afters.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:22, Reply)
I never tip delivery people.
So apparently you stole a dildo from Stunned, and battered tried to run you over with his car.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:08, Reply)
So apparently you stole a dildo from Stunned, and battered tried to run you over with his car.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:08, Reply)
Me niether.
I don't tip cab drivers either. I sometimes don't tip in restaurants either.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:11, Reply)
I don't tip cab drivers either. I sometimes don't tip in restaurants either.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:11, Reply)
I don't tip anyone unless their service has been way above what is expected of them.
We aren't in America ffs.
Edit: Did tip a lovely girl last weekend at a restaurant.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:12, Reply)
We aren't in America ffs.
Edit: Did tip a lovely girl last weekend at a restaurant.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:12, Reply)
She was wasn't she.
Just the right amount of charming and friendly.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:16, Reply)
Just the right amount of charming and friendly.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:16, Reply)
i often grossly overtip, i get embarrassed asking for £2 back or something
so if the cab is £25, and i only have £30, they end up with a fiver tip.
but i never tip hairdressers, which i feel i should, but which also feels weird. i mean, at £380 for a cut and colour, they probably earn more than i do.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:13, Reply)
so if the cab is £25, and i only have £30, they end up with a fiver tip.
but i never tip hairdressers, which i feel i should, but which also feels weird. i mean, at £380 for a cut and colour, they probably earn more than i do.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:13, Reply)
I'll let the cabbie keep the change if it's not too far off a note.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:14, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:14, Reply)
Actually thinking about it, I do this too.
Especially since the only time I ever get Taxis is home after a big night out, so I'm normally too drunk to think what I'm doing, and I'm normally busy trying to wake up my wife and get her back in the house.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:18, Reply)
Especially since the only time I ever get Taxis is home after a big night out, so I'm normally too drunk to think what I'm doing, and I'm normally busy trying to wake up my wife and get her back in the house.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:18, Reply)
£380 for a cut and colour is ridiculous and only idiots with more money than sense would pay this.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:26, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:26, Reply)
Why would I pay a hair dresser when I have a perfectly good lawnmower
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:28, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:28, Reply)
Mine either costs £5.50 for a good cut, or £7 for a not so good cut.
The only problem is that I can usually only get to the not so good place when I want a haircut.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:30, Reply)
The only problem is that I can usually only get to the not so good place when I want a haircut.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:30, Reply)
The most I ever paid for a cut was £20 and I thought that was inflated London prices
Mind you they washed my hair first and all that jazz. I go and see my mate Jacques who put you at ease by resting her ample breasts on the back of your neck as she cuts. She always gets a tip.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:33, Reply)
Mind you they washed my hair first and all that jazz. I go and see my mate Jacques who put you at ease by resting her ample breasts on the back of your neck as she cuts. She always gets a tip.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:33, Reply)
Mine costs a tenner
because I always let the barber keep the extra £1 in case next time they stab me in the face and neck.
I get my hair cut at a slightly scary barbers.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:32, Reply)
because I always let the barber keep the extra £1 in case next time they stab me in the face and neck.
I get my hair cut at a slightly scary barbers.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:32, Reply)
When I was younger my mum always took my to Bernards
Famous for his Short Back and Ears haircut.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:36, Reply)
Famous for his Short Back and Ears haircut.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:36, Reply)
necessary evil with my hair
stunned saw it when it hadn't been to the hairdresser last week. he was not slow to comment on the difference.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:32, Reply)
stunned saw it when it hadn't been to the hairdresser last week. he was not slow to comment on the difference.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:32, Reply)
They can only charge that ridiculous price because of people with more money than sense.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:36, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:36, Reply)
Mine is abouit £25
but whenever i go somewhere cheap, it looks shit.
i have troublesome hair
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:41, Reply)
but whenever i go somewhere cheap, it looks shit.
i have troublesome hair
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:41, Reply)
I would very much like a nap right now
instead I must appear focussed and hard at work. That's shit.
Still, could be worse - if I was in a meeting I almost certainly WOULD be having a nap right now. And then no more paycheques, I suspect.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:11, Reply)
instead I must appear focussed and hard at work. That's shit.
Still, could be worse - if I was in a meeting I almost certainly WOULD be having a nap right now. And then no more paycheques, I suspect.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:11, Reply)
Yes it is
I'd love to talk about food but as I'm not likely to get my lunch til 4pm it will only make me more hungry and angry.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:20, Reply)
I'd love to talk about food but as I'm not likely to get my lunch til 4pm it will only make me more hungry and angry.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:20, Reply)
You should bring sandwiches.
I bring sandwiches and often eat my lunch at about 11am.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:21, Reply)
I bring sandwiches and often eat my lunch at about 11am.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:21, Reply)
I do bring my own lunch
because the food from the NHS canteen is fucking dreadful, ridiculously overpriced and I wouldn't have the time to go and get it anyway. I don't even have the time to go downstairs and eat what I've brought with me; I've needed to go to the loo since about midday and haven't had time to do that either.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:34, Reply)
because the food from the NHS canteen is fucking dreadful, ridiculously overpriced and I wouldn't have the time to go and get it anyway. I don't even have the time to go downstairs and eat what I've brought with me; I've needed to go to the loo since about midday and haven't had time to do that either.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:34, Reply)
hello
i saw that you have texted me, but i can't reply yet as i am BANNED from having my phone on my desk at the moment - will check it at 5.31pm!
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:24, Reply)
i saw that you have texted me, but i can't reply yet as i am BANNED from having my phone on my desk at the moment - will check it at 5.31pm!
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:24, Reply)
We should all send her text messages so that come 5.31 she doesn't know who to respond to first.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:28, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:28, Reply)
this
is spot-on. i actually only send about 3 texts during the working day, but it seemed to be always when the boss was walking past, so i thought easier just to ban it than to have a row.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:32, Reply)
is spot-on. i actually only send about 3 texts during the working day, but it seemed to be always when the boss was walking past, so i thought easier just to ban it than to have a row.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:32, Reply)
Do you still want me to service your laptop, by the way?
Monty was complaining about his, so I might as well make a day of it. Potential beers afterwards.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:34, Reply)
Monty was complaining about his, so I might as well make a day of it. Potential beers afterwards.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:34, Reply)
Gonna be embarrasing when you find all the gay porn the "ex" has been bbeating his meat to
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:38, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:38, Reply)
this may be the most ungrateful and ungracious thing ever
yes please
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:46, Reply)
yes please
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:46, Reply)
You did tell me what was wrong with it
But I've clean forgotten. Largely because I tend not to take much notice of you. You'll have to refresh my memory.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:52, Reply)
But I've clean forgotten. Largely because I tend not to take much notice of you. You'll have to refresh my memory.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:52, Reply)
It can be, but it doesn't always have to be.
It's down to how you view situations, and whether or not you're the type of person to give up, or soldier on.
Alt: I'm going onto a diet of jacket potatoes next month, with different toppings, as it's cheap, filling, and rather nice. Just have to make sure I don't go overboard with cheese on it.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:28, Reply)
It's down to how you view situations, and whether or not you're the type of person to give up, or soldier on.
Alt: I'm going onto a diet of jacket potatoes next month, with different toppings, as it's cheap, filling, and rather nice. Just have to make sure I don't go overboard with cheese on it.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:28, Reply)
If people really believed life was shit they wouldn't have kids.
I think life is pretty good, I saw two people fucking up the back alley behind reese witherspoons this weekend, she nearly dropped her chips. That made life worth living
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:30, Reply)
I think life is pretty good, I saw two people fucking up the back alley behind reese witherspoons this weekend, she nearly dropped her chips. That made life worth living
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:30, Reply)
Haha!
I have my nephew for cuddles, although he's getting to that age where it's getting a bit embarrasing for him.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:38, Reply)
I have my nephew for cuddles, although he's getting to that age where it's getting a bit embarrasing for him.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:38, Reply)
Also she vommed everywhere last night
apparently Strawberries are a very strong allegen
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:39, Reply)
apparently Strawberries are a very strong allegen
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:39, Reply)
yeah, she hadn't even bothered to digest her dinner
so the brocolli came up pretty much intact.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:43, Reply)
so the brocolli came up pretty much intact.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:43, Reply)
With one exception
When they have a full stomach of milk and it comes up lumpy like cottage cheese. It fucking stinks and is horrible to clean up, I am so glad I have oak flooring!
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:45, Reply)
When they have a full stomach of milk and it comes up lumpy like cottage cheese. It fucking stinks and is horrible to clean up, I am so glad I have oak flooring!
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:45, Reply)
This is why my car has leather seats. Much easier to clean baby puke off.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:47, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:47, Reply)
I could never do that. It's so grotty.
I'd at least retreat to the car or failing that, some woods.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:32, Reply)
I'd at least retreat to the car or failing that, some woods.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:32, Reply)
Once I saw woman standing on the street with her knickers round her ankles
I asked her if she was ok and she said "Oh has he gone?"
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:40, Reply)
I asked her if she was ok and she said "Oh has he gone?"
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:40, Reply)
HAHAHAHA!
I saw a stream of piss apparently eminating from the front bumper of a car, as I moved around said vehicle there was a girl,crouched in a miniskirt, growler out havinga piss; her friend appeared to be passed out on the steering wheel, it was 5:30 pm.
You stay classy Bristol
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:42, Reply)
I saw a stream of piss apparently eminating from the front bumper of a car, as I moved around said vehicle there was a girl,crouched in a miniskirt, growler out havinga piss; her friend appeared to be passed out on the steering wheel, it was 5:30 pm.
You stay classy Bristol
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:42, Reply)
In Ponty, they have public lavs down near one of the pubs.
Just an open brick structure with a trough urinal in it. Went in for a wee on my way home one evening to see a sturdy-legged Welsh girl, stood up, knickers down, legs apart directing a fierce stream of hot piss at the thing. It was a torrent. Made me feel quite inadequate.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:45, Reply)
Just an open brick structure with a trough urinal in it. Went in for a wee on my way home one evening to see a sturdy-legged Welsh girl, stood up, knickers down, legs apart directing a fierce stream of hot piss at the thing. It was a torrent. Made me feel quite inadequate.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:45, Reply)
Women do gush more
Their urethra is much shorter than a blokes and it all kinda pours out. Its amazing that they take so long in the bogs.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:46, Reply)
Their urethra is much shorter than a blokes and it all kinda pours out. Its amazing that they take so long in the bogs.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:46, Reply)
Too busy telling all their mates about noshing off Dean
in the back of his mum's Corsa, aren't they.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:48, Reply)
in the back of his mum's Corsa, aren't they.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:48, Reply)
I saw a woman crouched outside Liverpool St station (member Our Price) during evening rush hour
having a shit. The crowds parting like the Red Sea around her.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:51, Reply)
having a shit. The crowds parting like the Red Sea around her.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:51, Reply)
I saw a tramp sitting down, cross-legged
arcing his piss into a drain from a clear four or five feet away. In broad daylight. On the High Street.
In Guildford.
The waves of pure horror from the adults and unbridled glee from the children (and me) were palpable. His aim was impeccable.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:53, Reply)
arcing his piss into a drain from a clear four or five feet away. In broad daylight. On the High Street.
In Guildford.
The waves of pure horror from the adults and unbridled glee from the children (and me) were palpable. His aim was impeccable.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:53, Reply)
If you can imagine me laughing and clapping from the first floor window
of the McDonalds opposite him, I suggest you do.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:01, Reply)
of the McDonalds opposite him, I suggest you do.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:01, Reply)
My wife tells me
That when the queues get too long in nightclubs she often see women piss in the sinks. Now I know men are disgusting creatures but I have never seen this kind of behaviour.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:47, Reply)
That when the queues get too long in nightclubs she often see women piss in the sinks. Now I know men are disgusting creatures but I have never seen this kind of behaviour.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:47, Reply)
I've been to lots of clubs but never seen women pissing in sinks.
Maybe I've not been going to the right clubs.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:49, Reply)
Maybe I've not been going to the right clubs.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:49, Reply)
I've had the misfortune to be walking through the NCP on Welshback in Bristol and seeing a chav squatting between two cars having a piss. Vile bint.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:50, Reply)
If you will insist on picking your mum up from Yate's at teh end of the night
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:52, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:52, Reply)
my friend and i went on a rave boat with the ex on fri. we had two choices.
queue for an hour for the ladies, or crash the gents.
i found a nice dude to chaperone me so i could walk in with my hand over my eyes. all good. my friend was not so lucky.
"excuse me," the massive bloke shouted in her ear. "do you HAVE a fucking penis?"
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:58, Reply)
queue for an hour for the ladies, or crash the gents.
i found a nice dude to chaperone me so i could walk in with my hand over my eyes. all good. my friend was not so lucky.
"excuse me," the massive bloke shouted in her ear. "do you HAVE a fucking penis?"
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:58, Reply)
She should have shouted back, 'well it looks like you don't either'.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:00, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:00, Reply)
If a couple of blokes were chaperoned in to the ladies
they would find their heads being used to open the front doors and their face would meet pavement pretty quickly.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:00, Reply)
they would find their heads being used to open the front doors and their face would meet pavement pretty quickly.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:00, Reply)
I'm used to gay clubs. In them you use whichever loo you want.
There's usually a few blokes in the wimmins, gossiping.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:01, Reply)
There's usually a few blokes in the wimmins, gossiping.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:01, Reply)
I was talking about real men
Not some feather duster wielding, friend of Dorothy, with no right to live on gods green earth.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:04, Reply)
Not some feather duster wielding, friend of Dorothy, with no right to live on gods green earth.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:04, Reply)
I'm longing to get something inside me
something meaty, maybe with some cheese
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:36, Reply)
something meaty, maybe with some cheese
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:36, Reply)
Nah, i was just really hot and sweaty after the gym
I think the changing rooms made it to about 90% humidity today, I'm sure I saw a small cumulo nimbus cloud in the corner
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:51, Reply)
I think the changing rooms made it to about 90% humidity today, I'm sure I saw a small cumulo nimbus cloud in the corner
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:51, Reply)
It's all a matter of perspective. This is very deep for daytime OT Blousie?
Alt: I'm having a reggae reggae chicken curry because they are nice. Although on the packet it says Levi Roots is a dragon slayer, which confused me a bit.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:49, Reply)
That's a given, they don't need to print that on the packet, they know their place.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:52, Reply)
I've thought about it several times but usually end up buying ready made.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:52, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:52, Reply)
My family tree
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cambridgeshire-18580332
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:03, Reply)
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cambridgeshire-18580332
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:03, Reply)
If its unique then why is it significant?
What does it prove? Some eccentric woman got buried with a cow?
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:06, Reply)
What does it prove? Some eccentric woman got buried with a cow?
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:06, Reply)
Perhaps they were trying to bury the cow and she just fell underneath it?
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:08, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:08, Reply)
back in them days people got buried with their possessions all the time
this isn't news, people
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:08, Reply)
this isn't news, people
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:08, Reply)
loads of civilisations buried people with their possessions
vikings, saxons, celts
the whole shebang
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:11, Reply)
vikings, saxons, celts
the whole shebang
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:11, Reply)
But back then you didn't really own cows
it was more a community cowshare scheme.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:09, Reply)
it was more a community cowshare scheme.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:09, Reply)
so she was head of the community
maybe she was married to the cow
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:10, Reply)
maybe she was married to the cow
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:10, Reply)
nobody on this board tips
we established that in the previous thread
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:20, Reply)
we established that in the previous thread
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:20, Reply)
I heard cow tipping is one of those myths so massive
that loads of people claim to have done it but they are all liars apparently
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:21, Reply)
that loads of people claim to have done it but they are all liars apparently
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:21, Reply)
Scientist says "I've found a dead cow, my career will never better this moment"
Man, archaeology sucks.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:11, Reply)
Man, archaeology sucks.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:11, Reply)
I think OT is improving slightly
Where is monty though? I think we need a late sub
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:12, Reply)
Where is monty though? I think we need a late sub
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:12, Reply)
Do you want me to tell you story about when I shat my own pants?
It seemed to go down quite well on Saturday.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:15, Reply)
It seemed to go down quite well on Saturday.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:15, Reply)
I haven't done this myself
but I can inform on my friends, if you like.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:16, Reply)
but I can inform on my friends, if you like.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:16, Reply)
I was flying through the night in a London taxi
back to Camberwell, where I lived at the time. Half way home I am desperate for a crap and the feeling is just getting worse and worse.
I direct the cab about 75m past my flat where there is a superloo as there is no way I am getting up four flights of stairs without crapping myself.
As I am paying for the taxi I cannot control myself any longer and release 5 litres of hot, black diarhoea into my pants and trousers. I manage to get to the superloo, rather straight legged, and go in and finish my dirty business. Then I discover that there is no toilet paper, so I can't wipe or attempt to clean myself up.
I stagger back to my flat COVERED. I get into the bathroom and get this gear off and hose it and me down. Much better.
In the morning my flat mate informs me he is going to the dry cleaners and asks me if I have anything....."Just this suit".
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:24, Reply)
back to Camberwell, where I lived at the time. Half way home I am desperate for a crap and the feeling is just getting worse and worse.
I direct the cab about 75m past my flat where there is a superloo as there is no way I am getting up four flights of stairs without crapping myself.
As I am paying for the taxi I cannot control myself any longer and release 5 litres of hot, black diarhoea into my pants and trousers. I manage to get to the superloo, rather straight legged, and go in and finish my dirty business. Then I discover that there is no toilet paper, so I can't wipe or attempt to clean myself up.
I stagger back to my flat COVERED. I get into the bathroom and get this gear off and hose it and me down. Much better.
In the morning my flat mate informs me he is going to the dry cleaners and asks me if I have anything....."Just this suit".
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:24, Reply)
jelly.b3ta.com/questions/matron/post660624?highlight=answers-post-660685
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:29, Reply)
I wanted to kill Nicholas Cage,
when I watched the remake of this. Utter shite, remakes are practically always pointless and crap.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:18, Reply)
when I watched the remake of this. Utter shite, remakes are practically always pointless and crap.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:18, Reply)
yeah, the original was great and had such a deep and meaningful point
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:19, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:19, Reply)
Deep and meaningful point?
Sarcasm maybe? It was well acted, and very atmospheric.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:22, Reply)
Sarcasm maybe? It was well acted, and very atmospheric.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:22, Reply)
i tried watching it a couple of times, it looked like old shit
tits dressed up as art and that
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:23, Reply)
tits dressed up as art and that
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:23, Reply)
nah, that was for her bum
in the boob scenes you can see her face
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:40, Reply)
in the boob scenes you can see her face
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:40, Reply)
Yeah but the new Total Recall has Beckinsale and Biel in it. That has to be worth doing a remake for surely?
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:19, Reply)
OMG If you watch them in a film it's almost exactly the same as them wanting to have sex with you.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:22, Reply)
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:22, Reply)
+ 's 2004 film 'Van Helsing' by pointing out that she dies in the end
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:26, Reply)
I shall reserve judgement until I see it.
Is one of them the one with 3 tits?
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:23, Reply)
Is one of them the one with 3 tits?
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:23, Reply)
I am going to wait until someone else goes to see it
If they report back that the number of three titted aliens is less than one I won't go and see it and they will find Colin Farrel burnt out on a council estate.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:25, Reply)
If they report back that the number of three titted aliens is less than one I won't go and see it and they will find Colin Farrel burnt out on a council estate.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:25, Reply)
Life isn't so bad generally
Alt: I have no food. This is a tragedy.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:25, Reply)
Alt: I have no food. This is a tragedy.
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:25, Reply)
i can't make it do a link to this
but look, read, and guess who posted on /qotw:
I am a member of the Conservative party.
I really should visit the local association some time.
I was out door knocking and leafleting in Walsall a lot in the first week of May. There arent that many middle class Tory boy stereotypes there, surprisingly. A few posh birds, but many of the people seemed to be sate educated "new money".
We attained the lowest net swing in the country against the Tories and held control in an awful year in a borough we'd never previously managed to gain since the 50s.
By the way, I don't agree with 60% of what central government are doing and only joined cause everyone here knows Labour councils are total crap.They waste our money, raise our council tax to immoral highs, and the last time we had one Blair put us under special measures.
FUN FACT- Rob Manuel blocked me on Twitter for defending Louise Mensch.
Hi fellow Wulfrunian, is you're reading.
Please Mr Ginger Fuher no delete my acount here I no speaky speaky bout Lolotics 2U nomore!
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:31, Reply)
but look, read, and guess who posted on /qotw:
I am a member of the Conservative party.
I really should visit the local association some time.
I was out door knocking and leafleting in Walsall a lot in the first week of May. There arent that many middle class Tory boy stereotypes there, surprisingly. A few posh birds, but many of the people seemed to be sate educated "new money".
We attained the lowest net swing in the country against the Tories and held control in an awful year in a borough we'd never previously managed to gain since the 50s.
By the way, I don't agree with 60% of what central government are doing and only joined cause everyone here knows Labour councils are total crap.They waste our money, raise our council tax to immoral highs, and the last time we had one Blair put us under special measures.
FUN FACT- Rob Manuel blocked me on Twitter for defending Louise Mensch.
Hi fellow Wulfrunian, is you're reading.
Please Mr Ginger Fuher no delete my acount here I no speaky speaky bout Lolotics 2U nomore!
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:31, Reply)
*points at nose with left hand*
*points at French coprophiliac with other hand*
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:40, Reply)
*points at French coprophiliac with other hand*
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:40, Reply)
Oh dear, is he not dead yet?
www.b3ta.com/questions/clubsandgangs/post1651162
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:39, Reply)
www.b3ta.com/questions/clubsandgangs/post1651162
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:39, Reply)
Defending her in what context?
Drugs, or marrying the manager of Metallica?
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:39, Reply)
Drugs, or marrying the manager of Metallica?
( , Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:39, Reply)
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