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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
( , Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
( , Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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The female athletes don't have much titwork do they? I think more arse shots should be included. And less fucking bagpipes.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:22, 124 replies, latest was 10 years ago)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:22, 124 replies, latest was 10 years ago)
It's difficult to tell as almost that exact statement was made im earnest by a man in this pub.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:30, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:30, Reply)
I bet they've all got fannies like a Howler Monkey's angry face an' all.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:31, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:31, Reply)
It's excruciating honestly.
The guy I'm working with is a straight up Midlands racist tough guy, lad bantz, mma, punch up for the fun of it (but not really), Friday night on the lash, Britain first, ukip are alright, teenage pregnancy daughter boring human.
I've worked harder than I have for ages this week in the hope the job is finished tomorrow and I can go back to the nice middle class south east
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:36, Reply)
The guy I'm working with is a straight up Midlands racist tough guy, lad bantz, mma, punch up for the fun of it (but not really), Friday night on the lash, Britain first, ukip are alright, teenage pregnancy daughter boring human.
I've worked harder than I have for ages this week in the hope the job is finished tomorrow and I can go back to the nice middle class south east
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:36, Reply)
Broken Britain.
I bet if he traced his family tree he'd find out he was descended from people not from these shores.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:37, Reply)
I bet if he traced his family tree he'd find out he was descended from people not from these shores.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:37, Reply)
Fucking potato wog.
Coming over here, stealing our tarmac.
He's not related to Rory is he?
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:43, Reply)
Coming over here, stealing our tarmac.
He's not related to Rory is he?
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:43, Reply)
Because if he was...
That would be...
Wait for it...
Drumroll...
A real STROKE of bad luck!!!!!!!
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:49, Reply)
That would be...
Wait for it...
Drumroll...
A real STROKE of bad luck!!!!!!!
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:49, Reply)
I would say sorry,
but the guy has made his "thing" about taking the piss and being generally vitriolic about most people on here and not in a lol banter type of way. I would have some shred of sympathy if he hadn't targeted some personal friends of mine, myself and my wife (via gaz), but I'm not going to shred any crocodile tears about it just because he was a reasonably prolific contributor to a silly web based forum. He's shown no sympathy or empathy to anyone on here in the past and while I hope he does make a recovery, his bile won't be missed.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:55, Reply)
but the guy has made his "thing" about taking the piss and being generally vitriolic about most people on here and not in a lol banter type of way. I would have some shred of sympathy if he hadn't targeted some personal friends of mine, myself and my wife (via gaz), but I'm not going to shred any crocodile tears about it just because he was a reasonably prolific contributor to a silly web based forum. He's shown no sympathy or empathy to anyone on here in the past and while I hope he does make a recovery, his bile won't be missed.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:55, Reply)
Pretty well said. I get the impression he was a bit lonely, of course I could be totally wrong.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:59, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:59, Reply)
On that note, I'm going to have some dinner.
This is possibly the most direct post I've ever made on here so i need to go away and choke on my words for a bit.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:00, Reply)
This is possibly the most direct post I've ever made on here so i need to go away and choke on my words for a bit.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:00, Reply)
He'd be glad we were poking fun at his misfortune. It was his favourite.
I do miss the fella. Godspeed Rory.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:53, Reply)
I do miss the fella. Godspeed Rory.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:53, Reply)
He was a bit of a nasty cunt here, dunno what he was like in reality.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:54, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:54, Reply)
According to Monty, a nice chap.
Which I don't get; why be completely bilious on here of that's not what you're like IRL?
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:57, Reply)
Which I don't get; why be completely bilious on here of that's not what you're like IRL?
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:57, Reply)
I didn't.
He was a prick. His 'I'm better than you and you're shit because you don't have a successful career fleecing gullible tenants out of money but hey it's all lol and by the way your mum's dead and did I mention I'm winning at life' shtick was tiresome.
You'll find sympathy in the dictionary, somewhere between shit and syphilis,
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 23:30, Reply)
He was a prick. His 'I'm better than you and you're shit because you don't have a successful career fleecing gullible tenants out of money but hey it's all lol and by the way your mum's dead and did I mention I'm winning at life' shtick was tiresome.
You'll find sympathy in the dictionary, somewhere between shit and syphilis,
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 23:30, Reply)
Is that what happened?
He was an utter internet goon but I wish him well.
The stupid cunt.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:59, Reply)
He was an utter internet goon but I wish him well.
The stupid cunt.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:59, Reply)
Probably practising for his upcoming pub career.
Is this a real thing, or just a meme that I've missed?
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:26, Reply)
Is this a real thing, or just a meme that I've missed?
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:26, Reply)
I really don't miss how racist drunk old men are.
Or sexist.
Or politically ignorant.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:31, Reply)
Or sexist.
Or politically ignorant.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:31, Reply)
I saw a racist old drunk in a pub in Newcastle many years ago.
Every time he said the 'N' word he spat on the carpet.
We left.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:33, Reply)
Every time he said the 'N' word he spat on the carpet.
We left.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:33, Reply)
It was called the Farmer's Rest, and was in the bus station.
It's now an M&S.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:35, Reply)
It's now an M&S.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:35, Reply)
It was actually a good pub with a really good jukebox.
Its proximity to the bus station, unfortunately, attracted the odd lost soul. Bus drivers, I think they're called.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:38, Reply)
Its proximity to the bus station, unfortunately, attracted the odd lost soul. Bus drivers, I think they're called.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:38, Reply)
One of my locals is in a town that has two mental hospitals.
Early afternoons can be ... interesting.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:34, Reply)
Early afternoons can be ... interesting.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:34, Reply)
I dunno, I'm not a Doctor, I just work in one of said institutions.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:36, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:36, Reply)
Honestly doc,
I hope your regulars aren't anything like mine were.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:37, Reply)
I hope your regulars aren't anything like mine were.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:37, Reply)
I've been drinking here about ten years, good crowd really. I think I'll have to stand back a bit professionally when I'm that side of the bar mind.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:42, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:42, Reply)
I'll be knocking it right down for the first months, I'll still have a beer here, just later on, what I meant was, I've had loads of jokey comments about bar tabs, freebies, stoppy backs, and I just won't be doing that.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:48, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:48, Reply)
Good luck mate.
I struggled to maintain any friends that were not part of the trade for the best part of 10 years. Your life will change. Find a refuge. Don't stop drinking.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:55, Reply)
I struggled to maintain any friends that were not part of the trade for the best part of 10 years. Your life will change. Find a refuge. Don't stop drinking.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:55, Reply)
I know the amount of hours I'll be putting in, so I'll leave the ale till later on.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:03, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:03, Reply)
If i can give you one great tip.
If you want the staff on side, when you line clean the lagers each week, do it after shift, and do it the long way, and invite staff to stick around and drink the couple of pints off each line you get as wastage. I've done it at every pub, and after a few weeks, it really helps build a team atmosphere, place for you to get to know them off the clock, giving them free beer discourages stealing as they know you're lettong them reap the benefits rather than pouring it away, and also, they will often air problems, or requests or sometimes great ideas in that relaxed environment that they wouldn't normally put forward. But make sure you invite kitchen staff as well, even if they never turn up just offering makes them feel included. Do not allow regulars to stay, kills the staff only vibes, but do allow staff to occasionally invite a friend. Easiest way to be good boss ever,
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:16, Reply)
If you want the staff on side, when you line clean the lagers each week, do it after shift, and do it the long way, and invite staff to stick around and drink the couple of pints off each line you get as wastage. I've done it at every pub, and after a few weeks, it really helps build a team atmosphere, place for you to get to know them off the clock, giving them free beer discourages stealing as they know you're lettong them reap the benefits rather than pouring it away, and also, they will often air problems, or requests or sometimes great ideas in that relaxed environment that they wouldn't normally put forward. But make sure you invite kitchen staff as well, even if they never turn up just offering makes them feel included. Do not allow regulars to stay, kills the staff only vibes, but do allow staff to occasionally invite a friend. Easiest way to be good boss ever,
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:16, Reply)
As a punter here, I've noticed the staffhelping themselves to bar snacks, I don't know ifthis is allowed or not.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:32, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:32, Reply)
Yeah, I think the present owners aren't arsed anymore, they've made their packet and are buggering ofg. One guy I've noticed is a bloody hoover, he's forever munching, never pays, I thought it may be a staff perk.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:59, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:59, Reply)
Bring it up by mentioning that you're aware snacks were previously free,
And say that it's no longer the case, at least until you're settled and sort out affordable staff allowances. Make sure you set Down some allowances in their favour mind. Draught coke costs peanuts, might be worth letting them have that
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:57, Reply)
And say that it's no longer the case, at least until you're settled and sort out affordable staff allowances. Make sure you set Down some allowances in their favour mind. Draught coke costs peanuts, might be worth letting them have that
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:57, Reply)
I don't think they really are free tbh, I think they just help themselves.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:14, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:14, Reply)
Yes, I know that , you know that, but this way they can pretend they weren't stealing, and they know you spot things.
It saves face for them and gives you the upper hand.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:15, Reply)
It saves face for them and gives you the upper hand.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:15, Reply)
Just be casual about it, suggest if it's easier for them, you can deduct the cost of the snacks from pay
Then you can charge them retail rather than wholesale.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:12, Reply)
Then you can charge them retail rather than wholesale.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:12, Reply)
Never threaten staff over pay. Ever. They take it wrong and resent you.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:16, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:16, Reply)
Just sack them.
On the spot.
Maybe the Doc should watch movie class 'Roadhouse' before starting.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:47, Reply)
On the spot.
Maybe the Doc should watch movie class 'Roadhouse' before starting.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:47, Reply)
People will absolutely take the piss unless you set the ground rules early
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:02, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:02, Reply)
I've gathered that mate, yeah, I'll not be taking any bollocks. You've worked in boozers, any wise words of advice
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:06, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:06, Reply)
Can you imagine if they did, though?
Mash up sports - 100m sprint combined with a rhythmic boxing match.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:26, Reply)
Mash up sports - 100m sprint combined with a rhythmic boxing match.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:26, Reply)
Christ the guardian is tripe.
I found a pub with ok beer and wifi, decided to have a look at the news. Guardian app came pre-instslled on this tablet, and I'm lazy and after 3 articles I don't think I'll ever read it again.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:29, Reply)
I found a pub with ok beer and wifi, decided to have a look at the news. Guardian app came pre-instslled on this tablet, and I'm lazy and after 3 articles I don't think I'll ever read it again.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:29, Reply)
I've been watching this 'lost and sold' on quest.
And thought they were being unusually undickish to one and other for one of these auction shows. Then realised they were all saying 'aboot' and stuff.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:33, Reply)
And thought they were being unusually undickish to one and other for one of these auction shows. Then realised they were all saying 'aboot' and stuff.
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:33, Reply)
How about beer at the end of August?
Mmmmm, beer... foamy and comforting :)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 23:49, Reply)
Mmmmm, beer... foamy and comforting :)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 23:49, Reply)
Gaz me the dates you're considering and I'll check with my diary and see what she says!
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 23:53, Reply)
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 23:53, Reply)
Only in the *special* sense that my medication ccurrently allows me to venture so far from home ;)
( , Thu 31 Jul 2014, 0:24, Reply)
( , Thu 31 Jul 2014, 0:24, Reply)
That's wonderful news.
(Not that I knew you were on meds, but all the same, great news!)
( , Thu 31 Jul 2014, 0:26, Reply)
(Not that I knew you were on meds, but all the same, great news!)
( , Thu 31 Jul 2014, 0:26, Reply)
Hold up there
are you telling me that Rory has had a MAAAAARRRRRRRRR IRL?
He's actually genuinelly a dribbling cripple?
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 23:52, Reply)
are you telling me that Rory has had a MAAAAARRRRRRRRR IRL?
He's actually genuinelly a dribbling cripple?
( , Wed 30 Jul 2014, 23:52, Reply)
I imagine it probably moves in circles for him now as only one of his legs works.
( , Thu 31 Jul 2014, 0:00, Reply)
( , Thu 31 Jul 2014, 0:00, Reply)
If
Paralysed down one side, we could club together and get him a head-dobber.
( , Thu 31 Jul 2014, 0:07, Reply)
Paralysed down one side, we could club together and get him a head-dobber.
( , Thu 31 Jul 2014, 0:07, Reply)
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