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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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There was a bee hiding in my jacket sleeve and it stung me as I introduced my arm to the garment. I've never been stung before so on the one hand it was an exciting new experience, on the other hand it quite literally 'stung' ha ha lol
How are you? Good evening.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:15, 264 replies, latest was 10 years ago)
Good evening.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:18, Reply)
Good BEEvening more like!

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:20, Reply)
Evening Meat
Sorry to hear about your sting and all that, don't let it get you down yeah?
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:25, Reply)
Cheers Bill, just trying to get on with my life, y'know?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:43, Reply)
Poor thing died. It rips out its very anus.
I only bin stung once. Rolled over one at a playgroup. The woman who ran it had to pull it out my arm with tweezers as the venom pumped in.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:30, Reply)
this explains the homosexuality

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:34, Reply)
So how many bees stung you?
You flailing mincer.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:40, Reply)
I believe he's asexual Jaysums. If anything he could join your LGBT gang.
Treat him gently.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:45, Reply)
you wish, faggot

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:45, Reply)
I wouldn't touch you or your ego with Crossleys.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:02, Reply)
MODS CRANHAMMER THIS BLATANT ABUSER OF REAL NAME POSTING RULES FOUND IN THE FAQ PROBABLY

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:16, Reply)
I still put it outside just in case he recovered

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:44, Reply)
No anaphylactic reaction? :(((

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:32, Reply)
Totes fine broski, I ent no bender

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:43, Reply)
at work
this sucks
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:51, Reply)
haha!
Silly cow.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:52, Reply)
Tosser.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:55, Reply)
how are the budgies??????????

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:55, Reply)
Loud. Jenny is more outgoing, Jimmy is a bit subdued. She nicks his grapes, and is shoutier than him.
Hopefully, he will become less bent, the longer he's here.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:01, Reply)
There were 2 African Greys in the house I used to live with. one bullied the other to death.
When they were separated the bullied one pined even more. The sick fuck.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:04, Reply)
AFRICAN GAYS MORE LIKE WITH YOUR POO ON THEIR WILLIES

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:06, Reply)
budgies are cool
i am glad you got budgies
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:06, Reply)
They poo a lot, if left out the cage we find little presents everywhere.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:08, Reply)
at least it's tiny and dry, not like a dog turd or seagull shit
just follow them round with a citrus wipe, the room will smell nice, and it'll be sparkling clean.

also they will be shit-scared of the wipe, because it might be a predator that wants to eat their brains.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:17, Reply)
what can i say? i guess 9-5 for £20k just didn't appeal to me like it did to you

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:55, Reply)
Jesus if you looked any further down your nose youd be looking up you bum ! Haha bum !! With poo in it ! hah

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:03, Reply)
it made dozer run away crying and leave the rest of us to play nicely
mission accomplished
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:06, Reply)
RUN AWAY TO FUCK A CHICKEN MORE LIKE

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:07, Reply)
what a cock

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:08, Reply)
Is it normal to get three gazes in a row from tim? I'm a bit worried about it all to be honest.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:08, Reply)
Yes

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:10, Reply)
How do I get my life back?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:12, Reply)
Just don't reply, works for me eventually

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:15, Reply)
yes

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:11, Reply)
I'm calling the police the next gaz I get off you mate.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:12, Reply)
fucken try it

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:15, Reply)
aye get tae fuck
Ah wis droapin' a jobbie eh.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:08, Reply)
it was probably more useful than your general advice

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:16, Reply)
Gutted, I'm 'chillaxing' with Lemmy.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:56, Reply)
send him over here, he can write an article for me

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:57, Reply)
He's sleeping on the playstation.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:58, Reply)
stupid bird
playstations is not beds
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:01, Reply)
Would he like to tweet Jimmy and Jenny?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:03, Reply)
No.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:04, Reply)
what do jenny and jimmy eat for breakfast?
SHREDDED TWEET
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:07, Reply)
They had seeds, a grape and a bit of apple today.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:22, Reply)
you're getting paid for bjs now?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:56, Reply)
i'm not YM

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 18:57, Reply)
no, you're YHCCIYM

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:00, Reply)
I have never been stung, how much does it hurt?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:00, Reply)
me neither
*avoiding bee fives*
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:01, Reply)
It hurt a lot more than I though it would, sort of spread shooting pains around the incident area. Now it's just feels like a bruise.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:02, Reply)
Now I'm scared of bees

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:05, Reply)
Bee, wasp etc stings can be fucking nasty.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:06, Reply)
so can ape
when he gets on about red setters and bin liners :(
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:08, Reply)
I'm lovely

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:13, Reply)
You actually do sound very nice. Why does everyone else not agree with this?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:21, Reply)
I dunno doc, I'm misunderstood

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:24, Reply)
Sought therapy?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:26, Reply)
Because internet

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:24, Reply)
Have you sold your place in f-town?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:26, Reply)
Nope, why?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:28, Reply)
Coz you moved into the half flat?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:33, Reply)
I've been staying here during the week for a few months, go back every other weekend roughly.
No point renewing the season ticket as I can pay for the tube as I go for about £30 a week and buy 'weekender' tickets for £30, so even if I went down to f-town every weekend it would still be £65 cheaper per week. Sensible eh?

Probably start thinking about what, if anything, to do with my house in the new year.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:42, Reply)
I'm just leaving this here mate.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-29464446
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:44, Reply)
tl;dr but good joke m8 well done well done

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:46, Reply)
I can understand your mistrust and paranoia mate. It's all explained here mate.
www.telegraph.co.uk/science/science-news/10603195/Short-man-syndrome-really-does-exist-Oxford-University-finds.html
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:49, Reply)
Come on Gayham, you're only 5'9" though

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:52, Reply)
Chix dig my tasselled loafers what can I say

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:55, Reply)
You can say something pompous, self aggrandising and hypocritical as a rule.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:00, Reply)
lolz
"One of the most interesting findings of the study is that short men actually do less housework in a typical marriage than tall men do - though the study points out delicately, this may be because with tall men, "the nature of their housework is different".

In other words, we are too short to reach the tops of closets where the heavy house cleaning equipment is kept."
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:48, Reply)
forest moon of endor

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:52, Reply)
There's probably a nice load of jobs going for short-arses on the new films.
It's not all bad.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:57, Reply)
short for a man is 5'6" and under
short for a woman is 5'2" and under

tall for a man is 6'2" and over
tall for a woman is 5'9" and over

caring about something as irrelevant as height is retarded in both sexes.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:01, Reply)
Yey tall!

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:02, Reply)
ack, did you even read the last sentence?!

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:03, Reply)
Don't need to coz I'm tall you see

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:05, Reply)
you aren't 'classically' tall though, you just seem to have a really long neck and no chin

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:10, Reply)
naked giraffe

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:11, Reply)
You'll get your own back when his wife leaves him rach.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:15, Reply)
that won't be for a while yet
there's still milk in that cow
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:16, Reply)
Keep your furry perversions out of this

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:15, Reply)
omg did you just dozer me?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:17, Reply)
You got all that from a thumbnail?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:15, Reply)
nah i looked at your facebook pics and also made it up

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:16, Reply)
Whoa, whoa, easy on the upset sweetheart. I don't make the rules.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:07, Reply)
I don't think she took teh time to read my exciting links.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:07, Reply)
unexpected levels of perspicacity here

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:10, Reply)
Jumped up dictionary sk8tr prick^

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:16, Reply)
lol
*imagines self on sk8s*

lols some more
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:17, Reply)
Those two are closer than they like to think.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:17, Reply)
well i declare
coming from dozer's bumchum, this is most distressing.

what will he say when he reads what you really think of him?
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:22, Reply)
ha ha 'upset' top webskillzorz

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:09, Reply)

the rules anyone happy
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:10, Reply)

the rules my wife come
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:10, Reply)

the rules any money
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:11, Reply)

the rules any decent posts
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:11, Reply)
Newsletter disagrees

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:13, Reply)
oh ha ha you are upset on the internet oh no ha ha

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:13, Reply)
You know what
I think she might be
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:14, Reply)
no one cares what you think

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:15, Reply)
not really! i do, you're a right laugh

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:15, Reply)
Sensible is sexeh

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:45, Reply)
women love a practical and thrifty man

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:47, Reply)
Rent it out to illegal immigrants, that'll pull in a few quid.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:48, Reply)
I know you're into tax avoidance and paying your thick staff ca$h to help keep HM Treasury in the red but some of us do things above board in an honourable and honest way yeah

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:50, Reply)
That's me

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:52, Reply)
Good lad.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:53, Reply)
If you pay all your taxes, you're a life failure.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:54, Reply)
Paye doesn't offer enough opportunities it's true.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:56, Reply)
I've just been described as atypical.
Im having that.

Atypical BENDER more like!
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:10, Reply)
If you turn the volume up on those deaf aids you would've heard 'a fucking potato head' better.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:15, Reply)
It makes them deaf.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:23, Reply)
Fuck off pookie

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:39, Reply)
I got a +

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 19:40, Reply)
Hi.
Yerr.
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:17, Reply)
alright

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:18, Reply)
Yerr.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:22, Reply)
alright mate

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:19, Reply)
Your bee woes are in my prayers.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:22, Reply)
Thanks pal, just 100 more 'likes' and someone will donate $10000 or something

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:24, Reply)
I've shared this.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:33, Reply)
I knew you were a trufriend , 97% of people didn't like and share. Shocking really.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:45, Reply)
Alright sparky?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:21, Reply)
Alright Apey.
What's the news of the week? I've not been around muchn
at week
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:24, Reply)
Battered had a bertdown but it was disappointing

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:29, Reply)
Oh, what did he do?
Insult folk? Post porn?
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:32, Reply)
Bingo!
Gay scat porn
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:34, Reply)
Where did he get Gay scat porn?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:35, Reply)
External hard drive

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:36, Reply)
Bonkers.
Have we got a sweepstake on his next return visit?
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:38, Reply)
I feel he's gone now, with a wimper

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:39, Reply)
no jaysum is still here

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:41, Reply)
He's probably just stepped and will be back to 'delete' his account again in meltdown style instead of just leaving it alone for a bit.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:42, Reply)
how are les chiens?????

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:26, Reply)
Small and fluffy. And they hate the rain.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:31, Reply)
Hey guys, look over here <<<<

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:18, Reply)
oh it's a long necked chinless man with mr men shoes

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:19, Reply)
H8ter^
You'll be sad when me and Swipey Are living it up in NYC
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:20, Reply)
i threatened him with this yesterday
he said, "pffft, ape wouldn't really go."
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:21, Reply)
Totes would, always wanted to

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:22, Reply)
You haven't met Swipe though, she's fucking hard work, you'd regret it

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:24, Reply)
STOP TRYING TO PUT HIM OFF

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:25, Reply)
You are though

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:30, Reply)

tickets.southeasternrailway.co.uk/se/en/journeyplanning/seasonmixingdeck
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:32, Reply)
Soz my deejay days are over

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:43, Reply)
Sad times
When will we get to hear your radio 1 endorsed 12"
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:46, Reply)
When we learn the identity of your celebrity friends. Friend.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:47, Reply)
Which ones?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:48, Reply)
ALL OF THEM WITH PICS OF YOU HAVING FUN TOGETHER AND DRINKING PIMMS

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:49, Reply)
I must get onto Monty about that surprise-o-meter he sold to me

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:26, Reply)
I ent carrying her around Manhattan

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:26, Reply)
over there though she's merely of average weight

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:35, Reply)
250 replies secures the loldelete btw

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:48, Reply)
sounds

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:49, Reply)
like

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:50, Reply)
a

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:50, Reply)
pretty

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:50, Reply)
fair

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:50, Reply)
and

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:50, Reply)
reasonable

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:50, Reply)
target

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:51, Reply)
to

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:51, Reply)
aim

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:51, Reply)
for

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:51, Reply)
to

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:51, Reply)
me

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:52, Reply)
old

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:52, Reply)
chap

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:52, Reply)
seeing

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:52, Reply)
as

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:52, Reply)
most

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:53, Reply)
of

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:53, Reply)
the

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:53, Reply)
clusters

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:54, Reply)
of

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:54, Reply)
posts

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:54, Reply)
above

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:54, Reply)
yours

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:54, Reply)
are

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:54, Reply)
pointless

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:55, Reply)
and

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:55, Reply)
irrelevant

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:56, Reply)
and

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:56, Reply)
therefore

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:56, Reply)
no

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:56, Reply)
one

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:56, Reply)
will

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:57, Reply)
miss

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:57, Reply)
them

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:57, Reply)
any

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:57, Reply)
how

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:57, Reply)
even

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:58, Reply)
if

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:58, Reply)
they

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:58, Reply)
were

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:59, Reply)
deleted

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:59, Reply)
by

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:59, Reply)
your

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:59, Reply)
good

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 21:00, Reply)
self

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 21:00, Reply)
just

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 21:00, Reply)
for

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 21:00, Reply)
the

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 21:00, Reply)
lulz

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 21:01, Reply)
prick

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:58, Reply)
I'm on the edge of my seat here

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:53, Reply)
Actually, don't bother. No rush.

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:59, Reply)
type faster!

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:51, Reply)
Can you just delete it now to stop mong tiger?

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:57, Reply)
Target reached well done

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 20:59, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2385532
(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 21:00, Reply)
Now don't delete it so that Mong Tiger looks like an enormous cock

(, Mon 6 Oct 2014, 22:21, Reply)

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