If this gets read by the wrong peopleI am probably dead.
Way back (1995) I was a bit of a slaaag at university and was nobbing my way through a few girlies.
One afternoon I arranged to meet up with a girl (Who shall be known as S) back at my house and then go out on the town.
That evening I whent out and got more rat arsed than I have in a long time. I woke up late the next morning with one of the S's mates in my bed. Looking at the time I realised that S was actually turning up VERY SOON. I motivated S's friend out of the sack and tried to encourage her to leave. Unfortunately she got comfy on the sofa and talked to my housemates.
A bead of sweat trickled down my forehead as a knock came at the front door. Surely enough, there stood S at my front door, looking randy.
I did the only responsible thing.
I lied.
Making rapid amorous advances I managed to get S into the bedroom, saying it was 'more private'.
Telling her I was getting a drink I then whent back to her friend in the lounge. She was sat there, asking 'Who was at the front door?'
'Oh a package from my mum' answered I. Rapidly realising that I might not get out of this situation with my bollocks.
I then got my housemate (D) to get talking to the friend and get her out the back and down the side alley, which bless him, he did.
At the moment she left the room S walked in wandering where I was.
'Sorry, hungover and a bit, you know, muddled.'
S actually accepted this explanation, at this stage I was doing a good impression of bewildered.
We then got a bit mucky and whent to the bedroom.
Upon which she found a pair of tights.
clearly not mine.
'Whose are these?'
'Oh their one of the housemates, she was drying them on my radiator. Fancy that, they fell on the floor.'
To this day I feel guilty.
Still, she was a crap shag anyway...
(Way back (1995) I was a bit of a slaaag at university and was nobbing my way through a few girlies.
One afternoon I arranged to meet up with a girl (Who shall be known as S) back at my house and then go out on the town.
That evening I whent out and got more rat arsed than I have in a long time. I woke up late the next morning with one of the S's mates in my bed. Looking at the time I realised that S was actually turning up VERY SOON. I motivated S's friend out of the sack and tried to encourage her to leave. Unfortunately she got comfy on the sofa and talked to my housemates.
A bead of sweat trickled down my forehead as a knock came at the front door. Surely enough, there stood S at my front door, looking randy.
I did the only responsible thing.
I lied.
Making rapid amorous advances I managed to get S into the bedroom, saying it was 'more private'.
Telling her I was getting a drink I then whent back to her friend in the lounge. She was sat there, asking 'Who was at the front door?'
'Oh a package from my mum' answered I. Rapidly realising that I might not get out of this situation with my bollocks.
I then got my housemate (D) to get talking to the friend and get her out the back and down the side alley, which bless him, he did.
At the moment she left the room S walked in wandering where I was.
'Sorry, hungover and a bit, you know, muddled.'
S actually accepted this explanation, at this stage I was doing a good impression of bewildered.
We then got a bit mucky and whent to the bedroom.
Upon which she found a pair of tights.
clearly not mine.
'Whose are these?'
'Oh their one of the housemates, she was drying them on my radiator. Fancy that, they fell on the floor.'
To this day I feel guilty.
Still, she was a crap shag anyway...
Razor What the fuck - a sig?,
Thu 27 Nov 2003, 17:02,
archived)
This one time, at band camp...once i stole an R2D2 toy off my cousin because i really wanted one and he had two of them.
then when we got home i got out of the car and ran round the corner, then slyly dropped the R2 unit onto the floor and told my mum and dad that i'd found it!
i still feel guilty.
(then when we got home i got out of the car and ran round the corner, then slyly dropped the R2 unit onto the floor and told my mum and dad that i'd found it!
i still feel guilty.
bigshape like a glove!,
Thu 27 Nov 2003, 17:14,
archived)
nice mateNot by me but aimed at me. About 8 years ago i was a bit down on my luck so my mates parents said i could stay at theirs (as my mate was off travelling i could have his room) anyway, i lived there for about 18 months in the end.After i moved out i would often go and visit but one day i felt very unwelcome. I stopped visiting and kept asking my mate what was wrong? he "wasnt sure" and kept making excuses. Anyway one night i went out for a drink with his sister, after we both got a bit drunk she told me what had happened. Apparently my friends mum had found a small folded "wrap" in his room with some white powder in (he used to enjoy a sniff)so he lept to his defence with "its not mine, it must have been left by x!" B**stard, all this time.
(,
Thu 27 Nov 2003, 17:39,
archived)