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How do you turn an ass into an arse?

Do you feed it tea and biscuits and make it wear a spiffing bowler* hat?

* A boweler hat, if you will...

(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Wed 11 Jul 2007, 14:03, archived)

Insertion of cellulite and diet of fortune cookies

Then give it a croissant

(Mrs Trellis GIN, Wed 11 Jul 2007, 14:05, archived)

*makes notes*

(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Wed 11 Jul 2007, 14:05, archived)