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# You need a guard dog
I can act like one.

edit: mostly I can act like the part where it humps your leg mercilessly until you turn the hose on it.
(I helped save b3ta! Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Wed 9 Jan 2008, 2:25, archived)
# i was amazed at the cat
she was standing on the arm of the couch, back arched, spitting and hissing at the window!
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Jan 2008, 2:30, archived)
# Cats are good that way.
Did the kitty tip you off?
(I helped save b3ta! Heffrey wants to show you his wood at SmileMoon.etsy.com, Wed 9 Jan 2008, 2:36, archived)
# Usually
The only way a kitty will tip you off, is to tip you off the comfy chair because it wants a nap.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Wed 9 Jan 2008, 2:38, archived)
# no
the loud shaking of the window and muffled thumping was what woke me up. as a result, i've had 2 hours of sleep.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Jan 2008, 2:39, archived)