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# DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG! DING DONG!


so i'm sitting here eating dinner and pissing about in photoshop and my doorbell goes off. i ignore it because the only people who i'd want to talk to all know to call me first or to use the back door. human fool proceeds to ring the bell again, which i again ignore.

several minutes of silence pass by. i like silence.

then the doorbell rings again. and again. and again and again and again and so i put on a pair of shorts and go to the door and there's a very short man there looking in expectantly at me. through the closed door (it has large glass panels) i ask him what he wants and he signals to me that he wants me to open the door.

'no,' i say, and he is clearly unhappy with me. i can live with that, and i don't let people in to my house unless they are wanted. he is certainly not wanted here, at least by me. i again ask him what he wants and he starts chattering gibberish, which is wholly unsurprising. he believes that i have understood his gibberish, it seems, and much like a bad cartoon, stands there just blinking and waving his hands.

long past the point of wanting to appear polite, i blink and wave slowly back at him, and he chatters at me once more, loudly, in a language i do not recognise (and which may not, in fact, exist outside of his head), becoming increasingly more angry as it dawns on him that i am never going to open the door for him. with one final outburst he reaches for the door, tugs on the handle ineffectively, and turns to walk away. i see him walk to the house of my neighbour and there he rings the bell....

back at my computer, i find that the pic i made is far too big to post and while it makes a lovely wallpaper, i can't use it as the backdrop to my toats.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 6:37, archived)
# That was me, postbear.
Why didn't you let me in? I was speaking my best Australian.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 6:49, archived)
# you are a short man. not quite midget, but still very short. midget 115%, i guess.
best australian? is that some sort of paradox, like mayonnaise cake?
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 6:53, archived)
# Could have been worse...
(I helped save b3ta! Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 6:50, archived)
# what a waste of coal that would be!
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 6:54, archived)
# better make steel out of it
in runescape
(I helped save b3ta! My Ass Is On Fire due to constant gas leak, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 6:56, archived)
# those åre åll words, but i don't understånd them.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:10, archived)
# reminds me how i once came to my friends house:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=N35CBdEh9Z0
(I helped save b3ta! My Ass Is On Fire due to constant gas leak, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 6:54, archived)
# welcome to gayruit.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 6:58, archived)
# thank you.
may i have a nice stay also?
(I helped save b3ta! My Ass Is On Fire due to constant gas leak, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:06, archived)
# no, not possible.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:14, archived)
# always fun.
(I helped save b3ta! d d, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 6:56, archived)
# frånkendisco.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:03, archived)
# it feels that way sometimes.
(I helped save b3ta! d d, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:05, archived)
# there's no limit.
frånkenstein would håve been å greåt disco person. i see him with gråce jones.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:12, archived)
#
www.b3ta.com/board/8576234
(I helped save b3ta! Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:19, archived)
# heh.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:22, archived)
# He was dying of poison in a foreign country
and you let him go tits up on somebody else's carpet and let somebody else take pictures of this amazing piece of wonder and let somebody else post those pictures to tell their internet friends about it.
(I helped save b3ta! hanke murphy, I'm a mess, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:12, archived)
# i've got other corpses to plåy with.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 7:16, archived)