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# Arf. Also, in news news, this is the front page of the Daily Express today:


So they did some research and it turns out everyone who ever got cancer never ate a mushroom.

Such a dishonest newspaper, it actually makes me quite sick.

Because I don't like mushrooms and now obviously I have to eat them.
(I helped save b3ta! zoldergoose, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 12:46, archived)
# You don't like mushrooms? What are you, mental?
So I'm immortal now, is that right? Thanks, The Express!
(I helped save b3ta! An Eagle in Your Mind, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 12:49, archived)
# Actually I don't mind mushrooms; I just thought I'd add some sort of comedic aside in there for the anti-news crowd.
(I helped save b3ta! zoldergoose, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 12:50, archived)
# It definitely worked.
Though I thought there was scope to be even more visceral with it. Like you're the fungus Hitler and your oven is the mushroom Auschwitz or something like that.

Seriously, FUCK MUSHROOMS.
(I helped save b3ta! An Eagle in Your Mind, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 12:55, archived)
# I also don't like mushrooms
When cooked they make me think that is was slugs would taste like if you ate them and it makes me gag.
(I helped save b3ta! Lazlo Woodbine Panowie!, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 12:51, archived)
# Mmmm slugs
They wiggle!
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 13:53, archived)
# OMGWTF
Me too, I can cope with little bits in other food but whole mushrooms are just DISGUSTING and slug-like and ... *gags*
(littlelise - domestically challenged, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 14:07, archived)
# i believe this story was utterly debunked last week
trust the express to get the news a week after it's been proven to be bollocks
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 12:51, archived)
# I bet the original story was something like "researchers have found correlation between consumption of a certain protein, found in some mushrooms, and resistance to some forms of cancer"
= EAT MUSHROOMS YOU WON'T DIE
(I helped save b3ta! zoldergoose, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 12:53, archived)
# something like that
but it was more along the lines of "well, eating them won't actually give you cancer, so that's good, right?"
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 12:54, archived)
# This article sponsored by the Mushroom Marketing Board
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 13:54, archived)
# I love mushrooms and have eaten them in quantity all my life
didn't stop me getting cancer 18 years ago though

(I helped save b3ta! wuffle, the b3ta bunny 's flea collar isn't working on, Mon 30 Nov 2009, 12:54, archived)