Hmmm. It was good.I liked the connection between the light and the wine. And the trapped immortal theme.
Could do with some editing, though. A few sentence restructures, that sort of thing. (like I would know, I'm a scientician :)
(Could do with some editing, though. A few sentence restructures, that sort of thing. (like I would know, I'm a scientician :)
The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated,
Mon 1 Feb 2010, 18:30,
archived)
fair enuff. it was written in one go with no real editing. i may go back and tweak it if i can be arsed. monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com,
Mon 1 Feb 2010, 18:34,
archived)
In one go? Then I am pretty impressed. The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated,
Mon 1 Feb 2010, 18:39,
archived)
in one go and half pissedi'm like hemingway me. well good at writin' 'n' shit.
( monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com,
Mon 1 Feb 2010, 18:47,
archived)