In my youth
I started getting my kicks from dirty magazines. It started out as something I could control, but it became more serious. I'd get so excited I wouldn't take the time to remove my trousers, I got a few questions from my mum about the funny looking stains.

Soon, the mags weren't enough, I tried seducing people, and although I fancied myself as something of a kid casanova, my success rate was really down to my complete lack of standards, whether it was kids from the local comp, raging alcoholics, there was even one occasion with a very senior member of government. Seriously, I'd put it in everything, the guys who worked down the local market, Lithuanian women with alopecia, I had a particular weakness for the young things working at the Ritz, all that luggage carrying gave them the most wonderful arms.

I was always at it,
I was an orgasm addict.
(LickOutTheJamsMotherfuckers!, Sat 20 Dec 2008, 0:00, 2 replies)

you should be OK
as long as you never fall in love with any of them, lest they turn out to be someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sat 20 Dec 2008, 0:30, closed)

Oh
Shit!
(LickOutTheJamsMotherfuckers!, Sat 20 Dec 2008, 7:18, closed)