squashed dog
approx 1 month after I passed my driving test I was involved in a horrific animal based accident.

Driving at about 30mph down a residential street I was just about to chuck my spliff (of cannabis oil) out the window when..a medium sized scrote of a dog walked out directly in front of my car.

Now the car was one of dads pool cars and was a fairly powerful 2.0i . In my panic I pressed the fast pedal in stead of the stop pedal. As I did this I scooped the dog up onto the front grill and hurtled up the pavement towards a stationary transit van (a-team size for you sceptics).

The dog was disintegrated on impact and blood runneth down the gutter for about 100 yards. The amusing part was that there was a chap sawing wood in the back of the van. He ended up in the front seats upside down with his pipe (smoking sort) broke in half.

How we laughed, I dined on that for years.

Strictly speaking that was me attacking an animal...feel free to complain. At least I am not writing a book about it...contact me at writingafakebook.com!
(dukefukem, Thu 2 Jun 2005, 10:23, Reply)