WASP!
I was driving down the M27 on the way to see my lady, hot day, window down, all fine. Then something flew through the window at speed and hit me in the face. I looked in my mirror and there was a wasp sat on my cheek, presumably happy with it's landing technique, although its wasp face was hanging off a little bit. In terror i tried to brush it off, although this just made the twunt sting me and its head fall off, so I now have a wasp's arse hanging out of my face, pumping its dirty poison into my face, whilst doing 90 mph. I swerve from the fast lane into a luckily placed layby and extract the sting from my face. My face swelled up something rotten, and no services between Bournemouth and Birmingham sell wasp ointment, so I turned up to my girlfriends looking like I'd been involved in some nasty road rage incident.

Also, my brother was riding home on his scooter late at night when a deer charged at him side on and knocked him over. Both the deer and my brother emerged unscathed.
(no1_cheesecake, Thu 2 Jun 2005, 12:45, Reply)