Awesome SickiesA colleague has been off work for two weeks now - apparently he's got something they can't diagnose, (although they know for sure it's not Legionnaires, Malaria, BSE or AIDS, he's supposedly in isolation). We are all sure he's merely sitting in the sun waiting for the World Cup to come on the telly.
What have you invented to get off work?
(
chthonic, Fri 9 Jun 2006, 7:40)
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bog roll mouthok, here's a top tip if you can't be arsed getting out of bed and going to your shit job. Have done this at just about everywhere I've worked.
1. Call your boss and say you've been up all night with hideous toothache and have an emergency apointment at the dentist, but you'll make it into work after you've been (to show you're a keen worker, not a skiving layabout like you are)
2. Spend until after lunch in bed sleeping and wanking.
3. After lunch, stuff some rolled up bog roll or cotton wool between your cheek and your gums, to make you speak like a mong, and call back saying that you've had root canal, and your in so much pain and so full of anasthetic you really can't make it in.
4. Go back to bed.
Your boss will appreciate you making the effort, and everyone will sympathise and tell you their horrific dentist stories when you get back to work..
(, Fri 9 Jun 2006, 11:20, Reply)
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