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This is a question Awesome Sickies

A colleague has been off work for two weeks now - apparently he's got something they can't diagnose, (although they know for sure it's not Legionnaires, Malaria, BSE or AIDS, he's supposedly in isolation). We are all sure he's merely sitting in the sun waiting for the World Cup to come on the telly.

What have you invented to get off work?

(, Fri 9 Jun 2006, 7:40)
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Actually going to work, but then getting some sleep....
I used to work in a big office, and was getting trained to use Oracle at the time. Whilst not at work I was also doing copious amounts of whizz and generally party-heartying it up, and got to feeling a bit tired at my desk. So when I had one of those moments when you just need 10 minutes shut-eye to get you through the day, I developed a couple of techniques...

Pretend to be studying Oracle manuals intently, put the book on the desk and rest your head in your hands with your elbows also on the desk, making sure your hands obscure your eyes. You can then shut your eyes and watch the pretty patterns on your eyelids. Only drawback with this is when you actually fall asleep, and are rudely awoken by your head hitting the desk, you look like a bit of a cunt.

The other one is to mention "ooh, bit of a hot curry last night lads, bad guts" and slope off to the bog. Once there, get a load of bog roll and scrunch it up into a ball, then sit on the bog and rest your head on your lovely, comfy bog-roll pillow against the cubucle wall. Then you can have a nice little kip undisturbed...

Once doing this I fell asleep on the loo for about an hour and a half, and on my return no-one actually seemed to notice or even give a rusty fuck, so I used the technique repeatedly to pop off to the shops or have a few games down the arcade...
(, Fri 9 Jun 2006, 14:53, Reply)

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