Awesome SickiesA colleague has been off work for two weeks now - apparently he's got something they can't diagnose, (although they know for sure it's not Legionnaires, Malaria, BSE or AIDS, he's supposedly in isolation). We are all sure he's merely sitting in the sun waiting for the World Cup to come on the telly.
What have you invented to get off work?
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chthonic, Fri 9 Jun 2006, 7:40)
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Ive killed off many family membersBut most were obscure ones i made up, like my aunty died yesterday, 1 day off sympathy leave, then of course theres the funeral...but i havent got an aunty.
Anyways, my nan happened to kick he bucket one time when i really wanted to have saturday off (i work weekends being a student) so i texted my mate, him being the biggest arse licker in the entire warehouse, to tell my line-manager. But he believed she was really dead and told my ex girlfriend, who id JUST split up with. She really liked my nan, we used to see her every week when we were together. So she rang me up all crying and giving her sympathies, i felt kinda bad then so i decided to tell her she wasnt really dead and that i made it up as an excuse to go out and do what i do best. Get mullered on anything i can get my hands on. Lets say she didnt take it too well. I think when she said "you sick, sick bastard" was when i realised there was no chance of ever getting back together. Ah well, it was a good night out anyway.
Ive also made up motorbike accidents and gang beatings. My last one was sun/heat stroke, my arms were sunburned badly and i just couldnt be arsed. Ive punched bricks on the way to work to make injuries seem believeable too. Its shocking i know. I just hate that fucking place.
(, Fri 9 Jun 2006, 20:03, Reply)
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