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This is a question Awesome Sickies

A colleague has been off work for two weeks now - apparently he's got something they can't diagnose, (although they know for sure it's not Legionnaires, Malaria, BSE or AIDS, he's supposedly in isolation). We are all sure he's merely sitting in the sun waiting for the World Cup to come on the telly.

What have you invented to get off work?

(, Fri 9 Jun 2006, 7:40)
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oh dear
Years ago i was a photocopy bitch at an extremely drab governemnt office. I went clubbing one thursday, partied on through into Friday and realised i was never going to make it. So I called in sick. Food poisoning, of course.
Later that day the office phoned me to tell me i had been fired so completely that they refused to let me come back into the office. They never wanted to see me again. The reason? I had been writing a 'diary', what i thought was a series of amusing caricatures of my colleagues written from the POV of a miserable, people-hating bastard (i am usually a happy, people-loving bastard).
I left the disk in my computer on thursday, and on friday they found and read it, citing 'security issues'. I remember calling my boss a 'mincing kiddyfiddler' and the nice old lady next to me a 'flabby chinned harridan'.
It was the most shameful episode of my career. One week later i was shelfstacking in letchworth sainsbury's.
The club was the now defunct Velvet Rooms and the music was some of the best i have ever heard, though. I wouldn't have done it differently. And thank fuck it got me out of that soul-numbing hellhole.
(, Mon 12 Jun 2006, 10:27, Reply)

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