He didn't believe me
I'd just started a new job in a new city and thought it would be nice to organise a night out with my fellow colleagues to get to know them a bit better.

We went to a nice restaurant and the wine flowed... and flowed.... and flowed.

Next morning I woke up feeling as if elephants had been trampling on my head then shitting in my mouth. Being lucky enough to have flexi hours, I stayed in bed longer than normal and reset the alarm. Still didn't feel better when I woke up so I called a colleague (she had been out too) and said there was no way I could come in, could she let my boss know I was sick, which she duly did. She didn't go into details with him, just said I was sick.

Next day, feeling sooooo much better and boosted by that chipper, lighter-than-air feeling you get when the hangover has lifted, I bounced into work and got my nose to the grindstone. I was standing at the photocopier beavering away when my boss suddenly appeared from nowhere - "Hello there, good to have you back - feeling better? What was wrong with you anyway?" Now stupidly, I hadn't really thought this far ahead and so blurted out the first thing that came into my mind: "I fell asleep with my contact lenses in and when I woke up yesterday morning, one of them was stuck in my eye, and when I tried to get it out I was sick." Oh dear God..... to make things worse, my boss is actually a qualified medical doctor. He actually laughed, looked at me disbelievingly and walked away. Haven't been off sick since....
(Mad McMad, Tue 13 Jun 2006, 15:19, Reply)