that'll be a takeaway for tea, then
as a kid, i was no problem to babysit. give me an enid blyton book and i was happy as larry. however, not many people who babysat me would let me sleep at their houses, for one very good reason:
i went sleepwalking. a lot.
once i was asleep, everyone else was on edge, especially after i was brought home in the wee hours by a policeman after a walk down the main road.
one night, my aunt agreed to let me stay at her house with my 2 cousins. i'd promised her faithfully that i didn't sleepwalk any more. i did, but they had a sega megadrive, so there was no way i was going home.

next morning, i was greeted by a very annoyed aunt. i had, of course, been sleepwalking. it wasn't that i'd lied to her, it wasn't that i'd set off all the alarms, it wasn't even that i'd woken the neighbours and the police had turned up.
no, what really got her wound up was the fact that, during my midnight amble, i'd gone into the kitchen and pissed in her pull-down-fronted oven.
i wasn't allowed to stay again.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 17:35, 6 replies)

An empathic click from me.
I still recall, when around five years old, waking up in the kitchen with my mother telling me "No! That's not the toilet! That's the washer!".
Thankfully, once I grew up, I stopped sleepwalking -- though when incredibly drunk I have been known to appear on the wrong side of locked doors and the like.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 17:47, closed)

isn't it weird?
nobody can ever explain how you got there, can they?
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 18:04, closed)

I think I have an idea sometimes.
But it appears I may be more intelligent while sleeping, drunk, or under the influence of Massive Drugs!(TM).
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 18:27, closed)

much like my universal translator theory, then

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 18:30, closed)

aren't you a girl?
that is some pretty impressive peeing, particularly for someone who is asleep.

I am assuming you didn't stick your arse in the oven with this compliment.
(bad_advice QOTW survivor from the first trollocost!, Fri 29 Oct 2010, 8:19, closed)

i am a girl
apparently, it ran down the oven door, which was a pull-down thing
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 29 Oct 2010, 20:42, closed)