When I was a teenager my mum was a childminder
She normally looked after new born babies but some children stayed with her until they were ready to go to nursery school. One child, whom we shall call Pete (not his real name obviously) had been with my mum from a few weeks old. He was a spoiled brat. He would cry unless he was in your arms thanks to his mum believing "a child should always be in his mothers arms". It was the baby's grandmother who dropped him off most mornings and she asked my mum to try and train Pete to not cry when you set him down for a nap.

After about a year she succeeded and Pete became one of the nicest children you could meet. He was very intelligent and quick to pick up what people were saying. This was obviously a problem as me and my brothers are three of the most foul mouthed people in Ireland, but he survived and never a curse word was repeated. Anyway on his last day with my mum before nursery school his parents had sent him in his best suit. Anyone who had met the Pete had come to say cheerio and we all had a big party for him, even my dad came home from work early to say cheerio.

Now my dad has a weird sense of humour but he is great with kids and one of his usual pranks is to get toddlers to say words that they can't pronounce right, for example 'Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious' and the resulting reply is usually very cute and funny.

So as Pete's grandparents are coming to collect him my dad calls him over and says:

"Pete, are you good with words?"

"yus!" says Pete

"Right then, say 'Bulger Plug'" fixing me and my brothers with sly smile and whispering "wait 'till you here this"

Pete looks down at the ground thinking hard on how to say this new word and my dad repeats it again. As his grandmother is getting out of the car, Pete looks up with joy in his face and a huge smile and gleefully shouts:

"BUGGER FUCK!"

It was obvious that he hadn't responded in the way my dad had hoped and his face turned to that of horror as this child was shouting:

"BUGGER FUCK BUGGER FUCK BUGGER FUCK!!" at the top of his lungs. We all erupted in laughter and left him to it. My dad luckily got his attention fixed on another nonsense word that stopped him shouting and all seemed well.

A few weeks later my mum met his gran on the street and she informed him that he was getting on great at nursery school but that some of the children there must have foul mouthed parents as Pete has learned how to say the word 'Bugger'
( Bamboo Steamer, Fri 29 Oct 2010, 9:59, 4 replies)

What
the hell is a bulger plug?
(WittyUsernameHere, Fri 29 Oct 2010, 11:11, closed)

i have no idea,
it probably is some practical device from ye olde days of olde.
( Bamboo Steamer, Fri 29 Oct 2010, 12:00, closed)

I think your dad knew exactly what he was doing.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 29 Oct 2010, 20:52, closed)

That's what she said

(Gherkinlasagna is probably doing something stupid on, Sat 30 Oct 2010, 1:31, closed)