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Home » Question of the Week » Bad gigs » Post 2028214 | Search
This is a question Bad gigs

Been to see some talentless gits on stage recently? Had your enjoyment spoiled by a twat with an iPad filming the whole thing? Been bottled off? Tell us all

(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 14:00)
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Moon Monkey's story reminded me of this:
Friday night, a couple of post-work beers with workmates. I've got the weekend to myself as Mrs V has gone on a hen-do.

A mate has joined me, and as we all chat, it transpires that one of the girls is going to "An electro gig - why don't you guys join us?"

"OK" say we, and off we head in the direction of - upsettingly - Old Street - towards Hoxton.

Oh dear fucking Christ on a brand-new bicycle.

There is a beard, with glasses over it, and - of course - a ponytail - standing at an Apple laptop.

He is making noise. I mean - just noise. Seriously. Don't get me wrong - I'm a fan of the musical arts, and experimentation. I remember when you couldn't hear the words, I've liked bands that have sung about pixies, I've done (massive) drugs and spaced out to sitars, and once danced at a cash machine.

But this really was noise. Sort of like feedback, mixed with static.

And the crowd - and there was a crowd, who were all bearded, bespectacled, and generally beponytailed - were loving it. I heard complimentary comments being passed about the quality of it. At one point, I will own, for about 30 seconds it vaguely morphed into a sort of drum n' bass-on-a-shitload-of-speed-like sound, which quickly gave way to ... more noise.

At one point, a beard walked past me who was wearing - I shit you not - a t-shirt with a line of HTML code on it. He was fucking complimented on it's wittiness by another beard.

Having paid a good five pounds to get in, and about that for a fucking beer, my friend and I were prepared to see the development. There wasn't any.

Afterwards, someone turned to me, impressed by the gig, and told me "If you liked that, my friend, then I advise you strongly to investigate 'Squarepusher'!".

I didn't.
(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 17:41, 13 replies)
It's times like this, I wonder if I should get a haircut, and shave off the beard.
Pretty sure I may once have listened to, and enjoyed, Squarepusher, but I'll be buggered if I can remember what they sound like.
(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 17:50, closed)
Was there, by any chance, a PA by Dan 'Preacher Man' Ashcroft?

(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 17:51, closed)
There were about 40.

(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 18:00, closed)
I like Squarepusher.
He's a tremendous bass player as well.
(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 17:59, closed)
Poor diddums doesn't understand the music
Quick, sneer at them for wearing t-shirts and having hair.
(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 20:52, closed)
It sounds like he understood it a damn sight better than most of the other people there.

(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 21:04, closed)
The story was it seems less dull than one of your stories. But only slightly less dull. Hoxton was
the giveaway
(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 22:00, closed)
sorry, who are you again and why are you trolling my posts

(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 23:05, closed)
Whoever is is has been twatting around on this website for 11 fucking years

(, Thu 25 Jul 2013, 23:52, closed)
Hahahaha
Yeah.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 9:03, closed)
That's a shame.
Squarepusher is actually really good.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 10:33, closed)
Squarepusher is very good indeed, don't be put off
Saw him at Glade Festival in 2009 and by crikey he blew my socks off.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:40, closed)
plagiarism alert
In the future I shall be 'borrowing', "bearded, bespectacled, and generally beponytailed".

For an advance royalty payment, take this click.
(, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 7:14, closed)

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