Owner Abuse
Bin barred from many places (mostly for being cheeky or just too plain short an ugly to get in [except for King's Heath/Erdington when I was refused entry for being too beautiful]) however I will recount this incident

Started the night in Σ|1 drinking expensive pretentious imported lager (Leffe) which normally comes served as half pints as it is fairly strong (think posh Special Brew). Me and my macho mate laugh this off (having the arrogance that comes only of spending a lot of money on a small amount of powder) , so after a several pints we decide to hit the clubs.

Having drunk away any taste or motivation we headed for the nearest flange pit - a place called "the living room" where older men in stripey shirts prey on pretty avaricous young things (or so they think until they clock the mutton). We pass the bouncers with a few well placed nods and smiles, and are just stepping in when an ugly and unkempt character who was loitering by the door says "Hey, you can't let them in looking like that". Mortified as I pride myself on sharp dressing ;o) and very slightly lairy I turn round and say something like "What, you judge my clothes whilst you stand there in your plastic shoes and scruffy shirt like the fashion policetranny at Moneypennies* - who the fck are you anyway?"

Answer: "I'm the owner."

Unfortunately a graceful exit was not the case as I then stood on the footpath abusing him, his fashion sense and his club for a further 10 minutes (no exaggeration - i had no concept of time or boredom) whilst the bouncers tried not to laugh, and he tried to get the bouncers to get rid of me, however it was all on camera so they couldn't really do anything. Eventually my mate dragged me away. We went on to have a fun filled evening of getting barred from another club, not gettin in to a slightly dubious party, car racing, spinning and crashing, getting my phone nicked whilst sleeping on the bus home in the morning (well afternoon) and many more pissadventures.

Yes I was a twat. I have learned my lesson now though (almost).


* Trivia Fact: Nightclub "Moneypennies" in Birmingham UK started the trend for straightish nightclubs having a transvestite at the door to weed out people who are not glamorous enough. Honest


No apologies for length as am well within the 50k guideline!
(jmaxi returned again on, Wed 6 Sep 2006, 16:43, Reply)