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This is a question Bastard Colleagues

You've all known one. The brown-nosing fucker, the 'comedian', the drunk, the gossip and of course the weird one with no mates who goes bell ringing, looks like Mr Majika and sports a monk's haircut (and is a woman).

Tell us about yours...

Thanks to Deskbound for the idea

(, Thu 24 Jan 2008, 9:09)
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Not so much a colleague as a superior.
But in name only.

The first job I had was working at Morrisons, as a 'Grocery Maintenance Officer', which involved the exciting task of turning cans and jars 'round so they faced out.

Anyway, the dopey bitch that hired me needed to know my shirt size, for the uniforms. I had already listed it on the application form, but apparantly she had 'lost it'. After telling her, I was presented with 2 shirts. 18 1/2" neck and 47" chest.

Now, I'm not skinny bloke, but these things were like a tent on me! I could have done the buttons up and stepped into it through the neck. My protestations about looking scruffy fell on deaf ears.

Anyway, I duly put one on, and got on with the job. Only to be fired 2 days later for - yep, you guessed it - 'looking unkempt'.

I was never more happy to be fired, and to this day I thank any and all celestial powers - real of imagined - that I didn't end up making a career out of shelf-tidying.

I ended up walking home, in the rain, with my shirt tied about my head. Although it had only been 2 days - 16 hours - I felt the depression I had started to feel slip from my shoulders as if washed away by the downpour.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 21:14, 4 replies)
Grocery Maintenance Officer?
Thats a new one on me and ive had the misfortune to work (i use that term loosely) for the company for a good few years and ive never heard anything like that. You are either a student, part-time, full time, supervisor or manager.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 22:42, closed)

We are talking... hmmm... 2 years, maybe more.
The full list of things that I had to do were:

-Turn items around so they face outwards.
-Push around a large yellow trolley and collect up the cardboard bases that tins of beans etc. stand on, and take them out to the compactor.
-General tidying, such as sellotaping half-empty broken packets of pasta together and putting them back on the shelf.

That's it.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 23:51, closed)
I think that's my boyfriend's job
He hates it, but he's too lazy to actually get another. He's been there three years.

I've been there two, working as a bakery assistant. The people are fun, the work is easy when they've done it when actually thinking about it but the people in charge are all idiots. Can never possibly be their fault, oh no...
(, Sat 26 Jan 2008, 0:16, closed)
Woo Story
Am i the only bugger that wants to get revenge on people who screw me over, definately on people like that dopey bitch.
(, Mon 28 Jan 2008, 12:17, closed)

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