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This is a question Bastard Colleagues

You've all known one. The brown-nosing fucker, the 'comedian', the drunk, the gossip and of course the weird one with no mates who goes bell ringing, looks like Mr Majika and sports a monk's haircut (and is a woman).

Tell us about yours...

Thanks to Deskbound for the idea

(, Thu 24 Jan 2008, 9:09)
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Disgusting fecker
A guy on my team is the most annoying shitbag ever. This guy manages to snore whilst awake, so you can imagine what it sounds like when he eats. Uuuurgh. Sometimes he does fall asleep and drool over the computer keyboard. Other times he just likes to pick his ears and then use various items of other people's stationery to clean under his nails. Oh and then there's all the scratching and skin flaking all over the place that he does. It's grim.

Then there's the lazy bitch who does the very bare minimum of work. She claims to come in early every day but in fact spends the first hour drinking coffee and sitting on her fat ass in front of the internet. She won't stay a minute past the end of the day, even if she hasn't finished something that cannot be left overnight. Which she usually hasn't, because she lazes about all day and spends more time huffing and puffing about the HUGE amount of work she has to do (which is probably about 1/10 what everyone else manages to do in a day). She'll leave it for someone else to finish off, but will never help anyone else. But you can't say anything to her, cos she'll go straight to the management and claim we all victimise her, cry a bit and then we'll get a lecture about being mindful of her feelings. Never mind the fact that the screamed at me in the workroom a while ago. That's allowed. But asking her to do her fair share? Big no no.

Then there's the arrogant cock who thankfully works in a different team, who had a go at me this morning for using the instrument in my team's lab, that I had booked out to use, because he hadn't looked at his data from a week ago. I did check with his boss that it was ok to use before I switched the method to my team's project. But apparently that wasn't right. All he kept saying was that I should've checked before using it. I did check, I kept telling him so, and he kept saying that his boss didn't know to tell me not to use it. And that's my fault how...??

There are more but I can feel my blood pressure rising right now. Need to calm down....
(, Wed 30 Jan 2008, 21:16, Reply)

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