Jesus, that awful!
Do you live in a crime ridden area, or are you just unlucky?
(Burt Burt, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 16:18, 1 reply)

Not normally too bad
I live on the edge of an estate where, until two very active families were arrested en-masse, preschool children were routinely taught by their peers that stealing wasn't illegal until you were 18...

Which delightfully resulted in me apprehending two 6 yearolds standing on a box so they could reach to lever the ignition lock off my bike.
The conversation whent thusly:

Me: "Oi, what the fuck do you think you're doing you little scrotes"
Scrote1: "We're stealing this bike mister..."
Me: (blinks in perplexity)
Scrote2: "It's Ok. We've got our own screwdriver!" (exhibits stolen screwdriver)
Me: "YArrrag (insert various wookie and caveman noises)"
Scrotes: "Wahh! We're gonna tell our mam!" (fx of running away)

Police: "We've had a complaint that you've been threatening the children who break into your garage to steal things. Don't do it or we'll lock you up for being a hamtoucher."
( DukeEuphoria Comes highly reccomended, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 16:42, closed)