I once went to a modern Chinese opera
And sat in the first row, listening to two exotic-looking women singing a beautiful tune. Suddenly, I smelled smoke. I looked around and realized there was no realistic escape. Thousands of people were in the hall, and I was going to die, either by trampling, smoke, fire, or a ghastly combination of all three.

I realized that there might be another escape, however. I could jump onto the near-empty stage and run past the singers to the back of the theatre. There would surely be an exit there. So, I steeled myself to leap onstage and run away, despite the beautiful aria.

Then the character of the smoke changed: from flaming matchstick to scented incense. It was all part of the show! There was no death-dealing fire. No doom; just art.
(Perv With A Dog had his eyes pecked out by scrub jays on, Sat 14 Dec 2013, 0:12, 6 replies)

Good job it wasn't a real fire.
In China, the leaders get to walk out first.
(McChinaman banned, Sat 14 Dec 2013, 0:27, closed)

I get a question mark and this fucker gets a fecking link.
My head hurted after one sentence.
( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Sat 14 Dec 2013, 0:37, closed)

Woolworths Manchester.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Sat 14 Dec 2013, 0:38, closed)

Best wikipedia entry ever! And then the officials left by the only emergency exit because all others locked.
Conspiracy, I think not those Chinese children who died were aliens. Blond hair, blue eyes.
( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Sat 14 Dec 2013, 0:41, closed)

Go drunk, you're home.

(McChinaman banned, Sat 14 Dec 2013, 0:47, closed)

Left some hard feelings, that Karamay fire....
youtu.be/c1D7fNecRMQ
(Perv With A Dog had his eyes pecked out by scrub jays on, Sat 14 Dec 2013, 1:02, closed)