Breakin' The Law'I'd taken some mushrooms in a pub,' writes Allen Smithee, 'and things had got a bit odd. People turning into goblins, barstools into toadstools etc. I wandered off from my friends and found myself in a carpark. I noticed a huge liquorice allsort driving towards me and Bertie Basset got out. I kinda realised that Bertie was a policeman and my brain went into paranoid fast forward. I decided that I must be being arrested and said, "I'll just get in the back of your car, Officer" Bertie looked at me with disgust, "Not bleeding likely sunshine. Just piss off home ok?"'
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rob, Wed 7 Jan 2004, 20:34)
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My mother had some trouble with her medications last yearand it caused her to go manic. She was talking to animals, seeing angels, and hearing "the most beautiful music ever". After three days of her refusing to see a doctor, I called for an ambulance.
It was a slow day in my town that day, so along with the 2 ambulance men there were 8 police officers that showed up. Two of them entered my mother's bedroom, and the rest of us stood in the hallway, listening to her ramblings. She said the cop in her room looked too tense, and told him to relax and tried to hypnotise him. The cops in the hallway started giggling, then looked guilty for a second until they realised I was giggling too.
Because she didn't want to go, she had to be arrested to get her to go to hospital. She was taken by ambulance, and I followed in the car. When i walked into emergency, she was tied to a stretcher, surrounded by police, and shouting "You take me home RIGHT NOW!" Suddenly, she got quiet, then slowly turned her head to look at the cop closest to her, then grinned and said, "Have you met my proud, proud daughter Alison?" Yes, my mother was a loon and was trying to hook me up with the cop that had just arrested her!
Fortunately, he had a good sense of humour and just shook my hand and said hello. Then I went to talk to another officer, and we traded phone numbers. What a day it was!
(, Thu 8 Jan 2004, 5:20, Reply)
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