Breakin' The Law
'I'd taken some mushrooms in a pub,' writes Allen Smithee, 'and things had got a bit odd. People turning into goblins, barstools into toadstools etc. I wandered off from my friends and found myself in a carpark. I noticed a huge liquorice allsort driving towards me and Bertie Basset got out. I kinda realised that Bertie was a policeman and my brain went into paranoid fast forward. I decided that I must be being arrested and said, "I'll just get in the back of your car, Officer" Bertie looked at me with disgust, "Not bleeding likely sunshine. Just piss off home ok?"'
( , Wed 7 Jan 2004, 20:34)
'I'd taken some mushrooms in a pub,' writes Allen Smithee, 'and things had got a bit odd. People turning into goblins, barstools into toadstools etc. I wandered off from my friends and found myself in a carpark. I noticed a huge liquorice allsort driving towards me and Bertie Basset got out. I kinda realised that Bertie was a policeman and my brain went into paranoid fast forward. I decided that I must be being arrested and said, "I'll just get in the back of your car, Officer" Bertie looked at me with disgust, "Not bleeding likely sunshine. Just piss off home ok?"'
( , Wed 7 Jan 2004, 20:34)
« Go Back
Oh the Hilarity
At a dress up twenty first birthday party many long years ago I came a cropper with the law.
I had downed a few too many drinks a tad to quickly and passed out in the toilets at the Rugby Club where the event was being staged. I awoke to find the venue deserted. As I stumbled around in the dark trying to find a way out I managed to trip the alarms. Next thing I know I am surrounded by police and being arrested for burglary.
Down to the station we went with all the cops in fits of laughter. They took my mugshot and then promptly told me to piss off home.
A friend who worked at the cop shop later informed me that my mugshot was on the police noticeboard for months.
PS. I was dressed as Spiderman
( , Thu 8 Jan 2004, 12:04, Reply)
At a dress up twenty first birthday party many long years ago I came a cropper with the law.
I had downed a few too many drinks a tad to quickly and passed out in the toilets at the Rugby Club where the event was being staged. I awoke to find the venue deserted. As I stumbled around in the dark trying to find a way out I managed to trip the alarms. Next thing I know I am surrounded by police and being arrested for burglary.
Down to the station we went with all the cops in fits of laughter. They took my mugshot and then promptly told me to piss off home.
A friend who worked at the cop shop later informed me that my mugshot was on the police noticeboard for months.
PS. I was dressed as Spiderman
( , Thu 8 Jan 2004, 12:04, Reply)
« Go Back