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This is a question Breakin' The Law

'I'd taken some mushrooms in a pub,' writes Allen Smithee, 'and things had got a bit odd. People turning into goblins, barstools into toadstools etc. I wandered off from my friends and found myself in a carpark. I noticed a huge liquorice allsort driving towards me and Bertie Basset got out. I kinda realised that Bertie was a policeman and my brain went into paranoid fast forward. I decided that I must be being arrested and said, "I'll just get in the back of your car, Officer" Bertie looked at me with disgust, "Not bleeding likely sunshine. Just piss off home ok?"'

(, Wed 7 Jan 2004, 20:34)
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One night a friend and I were incredibly drunk (no surprise there)
we were walking down Trafalgar Square, and he was so drunk he could hardly walk, instead adopting a sort of stompy stagger. A police car pulled up and the officer asked if he was OK. I said "yes, he's fine, he always walks like that"... For some reason they believed me and drove off smiling.

Another friend's dad decided to blast a squirrel in his garden with a shotgun right in the middle of the 2 minute silence for Diana's funeral. Seconds later the whole street was crawling with police, but they didn't catch him.
(, Thu 8 Jan 2004, 16:42, Reply)

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