Breakin' The Law'I'd taken some mushrooms in a pub,' writes Allen Smithee, 'and things had got a bit odd. People turning into goblins, barstools into toadstools etc. I wandered off from my friends and found myself in a carpark. I noticed a huge liquorice allsort driving towards me and Bertie Basset got out. I kinda realised that Bertie was a policeman and my brain went into paranoid fast forward. I decided that I must be being arrested and said, "I'll just get in the back of your car, Officer" Bertie looked at me with disgust, "Not bleeding likely sunshine. Just piss off home ok?"'
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rob, Wed 7 Jan 2004, 20:34)
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Shiny exploding things and Bacardi BreezersAfter going to see some fireworks (after a 2km or so walk), myself and a few mates all begin to return home, swigging as we go. One of us suggests we stop for a rest in a park we were passing. Me and another mate (for balance) happily spinning round at vision-blurring speed on a kiddies' roundabout (the sort with little bucket seats).
I utter the famous line (while pointing to people as they spin past) "There's someone, there's someone... and there's someone with a flashlight... er... uh oh." (I was pissed, OK? I know it's a torch really. Eesh.)
After being told that 'responsible adults' (age 16) shouldn't be playing with the equipment, we note that a couple of our friends have attempted to leg it rather than be interviewed. Due to their alcohol-soaked reflexes, they couldn't get over the fence, and got searched. Luckily we'd already drunk everything and chucked the bottles. Hehe.
(, Thu 8 Jan 2004, 21:01, Reply)
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