Breakin' The Law'I'd taken some mushrooms in a pub,' writes Allen Smithee, 'and things had got a bit odd. People turning into goblins, barstools into toadstools etc. I wandered off from my friends and found myself in a carpark. I noticed a huge liquorice allsort driving towards me and Bertie Basset got out. I kinda realised that Bertie was a policeman and my brain went into paranoid fast forward. I decided that I must be being arrested and said, "I'll just get in the back of your car, Officer" Bertie looked at me with disgust, "Not bleeding likely sunshine. Just piss off home ok?"'
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rob, Wed 7 Jan 2004, 20:34)
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I crashed in to a policeman once.Grwing up in Northern Ireland in the 80s, you got used to policemen and soldiers on patrol and hiding in weird nooks and crannies at night.
One night I was peddaling furiously along along a path on my bike and decided to cycle down the same steps I would cycle down all the time. Problem was there was a policeman sitting on them at this time, it was dark and I didn't see him.
I flipped up over his back and got grazed wrists. He ended up in a ball, screaming in agony. Then all the other policemen and soldiers on the patrol started running around thinking he'd been shot. And I'm sitting on thge ground shitting myself and repeatedly saying I didn't see him. Thank god they quickly realised what happened as if they thought I'd done it deliberately or thought I was a terrorist, I'd be fucked.
After getting my parents out and taking notes and telling me off for cycling on the pavement, I was sent on my way. The policeman was taken away in an ambulance, on a stretcher. So it could have been a bad injury. After the event we heard no more about it. To be honest I still feel quite bad about it.
(, Fri 9 Jan 2004, 0:04, Reply)
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