Breakin' The Law'I'd taken some mushrooms in a pub,' writes Allen Smithee, 'and things had got a bit odd. People turning into goblins, barstools into toadstools etc. I wandered off from my friends and found myself in a carpark. I noticed a huge liquorice allsort driving towards me and Bertie Basset got out. I kinda realised that Bertie was a policeman and my brain went into paranoid fast forward. I decided that I must be being arrested and said, "I'll just get in the back of your car, Officer" Bertie looked at me with disgust, "Not bleeding likely sunshine. Just piss off home ok?"'
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rob, Wed 7 Jan 2004, 20:34)
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My browas speeding through town late one night when all of a sudden he noticed those all to familiar blue lights in his rear view. He prompty pulls over and is approached by a nice looking female copper...
"Do you know why I've pulled you over, Sir?"
says she.
"Yup. You want my phone number..."
says he.
They recently bought a house together near Gatwick. The jammy git.
Oh, and while on duty she once picked me up from a pub in a jam sandwhich 'cos i'd been kicked out - then drove me round to a nearby club and told the bouncers she would appreciate it if they let me in for free. Only time i've ever been escorted IN to a club by the old bill...
(, Fri 9 Jan 2004, 1:28, Reply)
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