...or lack thereof
Back in 2001 I started a masters in History at uni, which I never finished, and shared quite a nice student house with three others, one of whom was my friend Max (nickname, her surname was Maxtead). She was quite pretty and a good laugh and we used to go out on the piss quite a lot.

One evening, rather fuelled up, we were both bemoaning the lack of action we'd had recently and hit on a plan where if neither of us copped off, we'd get it on. Of course, both knowing that we were onto a sure thing, neither of us made any effort whatsoever to look for someone else.

So we got home, had a kiss and undressed. She lay on the bed and I stared in disbelief. My gaze flitted to the, I now realised, hugely padded bra that lay like the most malicious of false advertising, mocking me from the bedroom floor. I looked back at her.

She was nineteen, and she looked very young, and slightly tomboyish. She was almost entirely flat chested, and the effect was completed by her being completely shaven. I thought to myself, this is so very, very wrong.

I'm very ashamed to say that my cock completely disagreed, but I felt extremely bad about it later. To be honest though, if I'd turned and walked out, that could have damaged the poor girl.

As it turned out, she went lesbian two weeks later, so maybe I did after all.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 6 May 2010, 14:50, 4 replies)

*facepalm*
I am very fond of you Beekers but you're a complete and utter tart.
( girlinthehole, Thu 6 May 2010, 14:54, closed)

Hmmm
An appointment I have at 5 o'clock suggests you might actually be right. :(
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 6 May 2010, 14:57, closed)

Aha! The old "Magic Breasts" trick...
...take off the bra and they disappear
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Thu 6 May 2010, 15:48, closed)