Eaten by Crocs
Back in 2000, when traveling around Australia, my skint friends and I arrived in Innisfail with no money and no food. We exchanged our passports for a nights refuge and promptly set off in the search of some scran. Due to severe lack of funds, we whipped out the fishing rods from out trusty steed and set about trying to catch our evening meal. Whilst two of my pals sat on the pier, Sam and I decided to venture down onto the banks and have a little swim and a paddle. After 10-15mins of frolicking our pier based companions exclaimed they had caught something. We promptly climbed back up the bank and assisted in the reeling in and netting of our meal.
Whilst we sat there basking in our man skills and ability to 'live off the land' a grubby looking local approached and asked us 'Are you fuckers stupid enough to have been swimming in there?'
'Why yes, we are of limited enough intelligence to consider swimming in such a place-why?"
He then proceeded to inform us that we are the luckiest fuckers on earth as the river we chose to swim was not only a tidal estuary containing the uber lethal and aggressive salt water crocodiles but it was also quite common for people to witness dorsal fins of rather large sharks in there too.
We were understandably a little shaken by this news, but not as shaken as we were then next day when we walked along the road looking down onto the small beach where me and Sam spent 10-15 mins paddling and swimming and there basking in the sun were 5, 6-7 metre long salt water crocodiles. We had essentially been swimming around above and with these massive killers and we didn't have a scooby. That was our lucky escape.
(lankynyack, Wed 10 Jul 2013, 13:45, 8 replies)

Top Tip:
Avoid savage wildlife by having a 44000L saltwater pool installed at home.
( Muns, Wed 10 Jul 2013, 14:35, closed)

Oh, sterling work here.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 10 Jul 2013, 21:03, closed)

Rather conveniently, many areas
now have signs in place to protect the tourists.

Amazing what we can do when we re not slapping each other on the back for making up piss-weak jokes.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Wed 10 Jul 2013, 21:31, closed)

Starting the meltdown clock.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 10 Jul 2013, 21:58, closed)

Ka-ka-du-du-du
Push pineapple shake the tree
( Ghoti Fingers, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 7:20, closed)

Oh wow.
How to disrespect a whole indigenous nation.
All in 1 go.

Nvm, we did say sorry.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Thu 11 Jul 2013, 9:34, closed)

There used to be some sharks in there but the crocodiles cleaned them out

(Redemption blamed it on the Bossa Nova since, Wed 10 Jul 2013, 14:36, closed)

Skint,
but you kept your fishing rods inside of a horse. I applaud you for not just eating the horse.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 10 Jul 2013, 15:16, closed)