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This is a question Bullshit and Bullshitters

We've had questions about lies and liars in the past, but this time we're asking about the sort of fantasist who constantly claims they've got a helicopter in the garden or was "second onto the balcony at the Iranian Embassy siege". Tell us about the cobblers you've been told, or the complete lies you've come out with.

Thanks to dozer for the suggestion

(, Thu 13 Jan 2011, 12:55)
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Continuing on the theme of Vagabond's story below
not exactly bullshit, but an excellent lie to tell small annoying children:
I was looking after my odious little fart of a cousin, who persisted in coughing and sneezing and generally being a snot-filled germ factory at an age when he should have known better. He was chucking a tantrum after being told to put down his DS and come to the dinner table, ignoring his pathetic mothers limp estuary exclamations of 'aaaoooowwww beeeeeen, daon't do vat!', so I seized him bodily with the intention of dragging him there (and possibly bashing him 'accidentally' against the door frame...) when he coughed, right in my face. And then sneezed, right in my face. And then laughed.

Wiping mucus from my face and grasping his wretched little arm very tightly, I told him in a low and angry tone that the reason people put their hands over their mouths when they cough or sneeze is to stop the change in pressure from causing their brains to come through their nose.

Apparently this gave him nightmares for several weeks. I'm not allowed to babysit him anymore, thank fuck.
(, Thu 13 Jan 2011, 17:00, 1 reply)
Good for you
Some of those little fuckers know exactly what they're doing. The shitters.
(, Thu 13 Jan 2011, 23:54, closed)

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