You'll have to bear with me on this one...
It would have been more than ten years ago now, and my memory's a bit hazy. Then again, I may have blotted most of it out. Anyway, I was getting on the bus to work one afternoon and, lo and behold, a woman at the wheel! Now I know what you're thinking, and I've got nothing against women drivers generally, but this one was really something special. Christ almighty, you'd think she'd never driven a bus before - it was like one of the Chuckle Brothers had taken too many amphets. Pavements were mounted, cars walls and lamp posts were narrowly missed. And as for the woman with the pram; all I can say is she had a very lucky escape. I swear that we didn't once go below 50mph on that stretch.

I was getting pretty damn concerned by this point, especially since she seemed more interested in chatting to some bloke she'd picked up earlier. If anything he was even worse, but he seemed to have some strange effect on her. The guy was a total chopper, the backseat driver from hell: He spent the entire trip alternating dubious advice with patronising encouragement, and occasionally hitting on her. From time to time he'd turn round and shout at the rest of us, like we gave a toss what he had to say. By this time I was just staring out of the window and praying for my stop to come.

Alas, it was not to be. Perhaps it was because of him, but her navigation was spectacularly awful as well. We went careering off down a road that had been closed, and spent a good half hour doing circuits round the airport. Everyone was seriously disgruntled, but the two Fuhrers at the front wouldn't let anyone off; and the nice lady who did try to assert herself got such rough treatment that nobody else dared after that.

Anyway, it took police intervention to persuade her to let us off in the end. Her mate wandered off - something about catching a tube train - and the bus whizzzed off down the airport runway and exploded.

Bindun, surely?
(Bernard Bernoulli, Sat 27 Jun 2009, 11:11, 4 replies)

yes
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 27 Jun 2009, 11:24, closed)

Bindun?
Yes. Yes it has.
( MatJ LOOK, Sat 27 Jun 2009, 14:30, closed)

*sob*
...
(Bernard Bernoulli, Sat 27 Jun 2009, 16:06, closed)

Kudos
You had me fooled. Im surprised I didnt get it at 50mph.
(Federale, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 21:28, closed)