I once was a call centre of one...
.... when I did my turn answering the phone when I used to work for a bingo hall. I had to sit in a room all by myself and wait for the phone to ring. That's it, no other tasks. Yawn. None of the following is very funny, but it just goes to show that it takes all sorts to make a world.

I got such questions as;
"Will it be busy tonight ?" (I would have liked to say, "No, I'll only let a few in if you like, I'm on reception later")
"I think I dropped a fifty pound note at the bar, has anyone handed it in ?" (My faith in human nature would have been restored if I could have truthfully said, "Yes, I have it right here, someone handed it in just now," but monkeys might fly out of my arse before that would have ever happened)
"Can you tell the girl that works on the payout cash desk on a thursday night that I'd like to see her naked ?" (This was a woman caller. This is totally true, and I was said girl. I bat for the other team so I was flattered, but didn't tell her she was talking to the object of her ... er ... affections.)
"How do you play bingo ?" (You're shittin me right ?")
Followed by the ultimate, "If I don't win, do I get my money back ?"

I also got to look up people's membership details, and thus came across such fantastic surnames as Weijerratnum (prolly spelled it wrong but it's close, Polish apparently) and Ratnavel (I like that one especially.)

I have a friend who works for a very large energy company - now off the phones but once a phone grunt - who could tell some fine stories. I know he floats about on here so - how about it Mr Bass Player ?
(womanwhocanonlylivewithdogs, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 13:04, 2 replies)

But
You have a male fiance, you always bang on about him!
(b3ta_polis, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 23:36, closed)

Consider yourself duly clicked
for 'monkeys might fly out of my arse'.
(berk, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 11:17, closed)