Directory enquiries
I worked in a call centre once - it was for charities and it made my soul go black and I have no funny stories from my time there. However, I have a mate who is an obnoxious drunk twat and he had a moment of inspiration after too much sauce one evening.

He rang up 118 118 and asked to be put through to 118 247. The kindly operator declined the request, claiming it was against their interest to put him through to their competitor. A bout of verbal sparring ensued in which inevitably (does this happen in normal enquiries?) the supervisor was summoned. Again, the supervisor confirmed that it was against their policy to put him through to a competitor. Negotiations ended with the happy result of reimbursment for the call in the form of a cheque a few days later, but no connection to 118 247.

This friend of mine went through a phase of calling directory enquiries when pissed - not healthy for his liver or bank balance, but we got many laughs from it. Other highlights included the late night search for Father Christmas: there are none in Lapland, but the operator found a few on the east coast of America.
(tim dog, Sun 6 Sep 2009, 18:07, 2 replies)

charlie clarke
whisky drinking legend of voodoo love lounge fame
(magictorch, Mon 7 Sep 2009, 13:53, closed)

sussed
Wow, there's people from real life here!
(tim dog, Mon 7 Sep 2009, 14:38, closed)