I bought a Renault Laguna Diesel..
from a bloke I'd known for ages, it was in decent nick and a diesel which is what I wanted. So I pays me money and sets off home.

Driving up the motorway about 15 minutes later, foot flat to the floor and this fucking thing is struggling to reach 70 mph and I'm thinking 'I've made a BIG mistake with this'.

As I was passing a 7.5 tonne truck at about 65, car engine straining like fuck, my bonnet flew up, smashing my windscreen and causing the seat of my trousers to turn a smelly shade of brown. I swear I could see shards of glass floating past me in ultra slow motion.

Anyway, bloke in the truck saw what was happening and dropped back to let me pull onto the hard shoulder cos I couldn't see where I was going on account of a large sheet of metal blocking my view. I managed to get onto the shoulder and stopped.

I got out of the car, shaking like a very shaky thing. About 4 feet in front of me was one of those huge signs for roadworks. If I'd have hit that, I'd probably be dead by now.

Anyhoo, I got back in the car thinking 'what do I do now?'.
A little voice in my head informed me that I wasn't insured. A little voice from my mouth said 'Oh fuck....'. The car wasn't taxed either as I needed to go to the DVLA office to change the taxation class from 'disabled' to 'PLG'...

So, phoned my insurance company, changed the insurance from my old car to this one, took me 10 minutes. 20 minutes later, I called them again and said summat along the lines of 'You're not gonna believe this but...'. I told them what had happened, they said 'don't worry, it happens all the time'. Amazed..

Next day, Mrs Toonarme took me to the local DVLA place where I changed the Taxation Class and put 6 months tax on it, backdated to the start of the month...

End result, I paid £900 for the car, the car was written off by the insyrance because the roof was dented and it would have cost too much to get it right and the insurance valued it at £1900, so even after my excess, I got £1700. Didn't even affect my no claims...

I feel really guilty sometimes...

I've had a bunch of Renaults, that was my last one. Apart from one or two, they were shit.
( His Popiness the Hole Invaded Poland on, Fri 23 Apr 2010, 22:40, 2 replies)

another Laguna.
I had my bonnet pop up on the M18 doing 80. I ended up stopping in the fast lane as it was chocca and I couldn't see chuff all to get over to the hard shoulder. Made a right old mess of the car. and my underpants.

First thoughts were "what the fuck is that on my windsceen."
(wheelspanner is cleaning the dead flies off his helmit on, Sat 24 Apr 2010, 8:23, closed)

The guy who picked my Laguna up
and took me home said mine wasn't the first and probably won't be the last that he'd done. Should sue Renault for the cost of the dry cleaning...
( His Popiness the Hole Invaded Poland on, Sat 24 Apr 2010, 14:40, closed)