Courtesy of my mate Mark... one of the most Sarcastic people ever.
Picture it, 1am, local garage forecourt.

Mark is refilling the radiator on his dodgy old Maestro, composed mainly of bodyfiller and newspaper.

Our wonderful boys in blue turn up, pull right up to the door of his car, get out, notebook in hand, and utter the immortal line 'Is this your car, Sir?'

Mark, being Mark -

-"No Officer, I steal peoples cars and do routine maintenance on them'.

Handcuffs hurt. As does 'accidentally' having your head whacked on the way into the Police car. Apparently. No sense of humour, that lot.
(ArfurDaley Must try harder., Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:39, 3 replies)

Hahahahahhaa
That Jack Dee comment "Policemen don't like it when you tell them that your occupation is 'Comedian'."
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:46, closed)

SoH failure
You want to try humour on the security staff and customs officers at airports.

Then again, no you don't. Latex gloves aren't always fun.
(Neil_E_There didn't the Aussies used to be good at cricket?, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:25, closed)

Cavity searches go as far as the gums
Regardless of the starting point
( Cadmus has teh uplikn coeds at, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 15:18, closed)