I think I've told this before but
A surefire way to not endear yourself to John Barnes is to sit next to him for 2 hours, on the London to Liverpool train, hungover to the back teeth, doing the rap from "World in Motion" under your breath, pausing only to laugh manically in his face before continuing.

As he pushed past me to go to the toilets, a bloke on the next table said, sotto voce,

"let himself go a bit, hasn't he?"

He has too, the fat knacker.
(Rakky (forgot her password) The muffin maverick, Fri 9 Oct 2009, 11:10, 6 replies)

Ahhhh, Rakky
Once again, you make me giggle...
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 9 Oct 2009, 11:15, closed)

Seconded
World in Motion remains a landmark football song, despite John Barnes's awful lyrical vandalism.

He had a shit taste in shell suits back in the day too.

*clicks*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 9 Oct 2009, 11:24, closed)

when he pushed past you
did he get round the back?
( Piper Alpha is being a grumpy northerm bastard on:, Fri 9 Oct 2009, 11:39, closed)

Oh well,
the fat knacker has just been sacked from his job at Tranmere.
( M3rx likes the Asian ladies, Fri 9 Oct 2009, 11:48, closed)

John!!
4-2-2-2 DOESN'T WORK UNLESS YOU ARE BRAZIL
(McChinaman banned, Fri 9 Oct 2009, 16:22, closed)

That must have been...
...ninety minutes of sheer hell for him...
(Merson, Tue 13 Oct 2009, 16:49, closed)