Now then young man, sit on my knee and have a pea
Jimmy Saville..

I've met Jimmy a couple of times in Leeds, and the guy is a complete fruitcake:

The first meeting was at an Indian Restaurant, a few minutes from where Jimmy lives - he stumbled in, smoked a cigar and looked around for anyone who was willing to have a chat.

We were paying our bill at the time, and Jimmy walks up and gives a 'How do?', I respond to the positive, and return the question, he replies with '10 out of 10 lad, 10 out of 10.. but now it is time to DON. MY. DISGUISE!'

He proceeds to pull his wooly hat over his head, puts his sunglasses onto his face which is now covered by the hat, exclaims 'oh tha no, I can't see lad!', stumbles out of the restaurant, and proceeds to drive his car in reverse (no word of a lie) all the way back to his flat. Thoroughly mental.

The second time was at a (now closed) Cantonese restaurant . My girlfriend and I were waiting for a table, as was Jimmy, and we were having a bit of a banter. He was wearing a green and black Adidas shellsuit, with the jacket opened to reveal a Rab C. Nesbitt-esque string vest, greyed chest fuzz on display. For some reason, he kept alternating between asking my girlfriend to sit on his knee, or have a nap under his chair because she looked a bit tired (???).

He then gets seen to his table, which is right next to the waiting area, Jimmy then turns round, looks me in the eye and says "Now then, don't you be dipping your hand in my pockets and stealing my jewels!"

My girlfriend replies with "We wouldn't think of it Jimmy!"

Jimmy shot back with "I know *you* wouldn't because you're lovely, but HIM (pointing at me), he looks SHIFTY", while his eyes boggled around in semi-lucid suspicion.

Geriatric cnut..

Long, chavvy, and covered in jingle-jangle-jewellery
(Lythium deals in lead, my friend., Mon 12 Oct 2009, 11:41, 3 replies)

Long, chavvy, covered in jingle-jangle-jewellery
and funneh!

*click*
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 11:53, closed)

but what was the year?

( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 11:56, closed)

It was about 2005..
Maybe 2006 for the second meeting, but it was a little while ago now..
(Lythium deals in lead, my friend., Mon 12 Oct 2009, 12:17, closed)