Aha!
This is a first. Usually I see a qotw and think "Ah I have some answers I can put" or "Bugger I've no stories about that to tell", but for the first time I'll be taking notes and learning from the massive wealth of tips here.

I'm bloody useless at asking people out. Completely useless. I met a lass when I was the tender age of fifteen and was with her until I was twenty seven, so when everyone else was learning the intricacies of speaking to the opposite sex, I was fine-tuning my arguing skills. To be fair, after all the shite I went through I was pretty much happy to be on my lonesome for a good while, but these days I'm starting to feel the itch again and have realised recently how completely clueless I am.

My icebreakers are useless for a start. Attempts have ranged from "Hiya. Where you from?" to "Don't eat the fish!" (apparently, I have no memory of that one. I have to hand it to drunken me, he's creative.)

My personal best was while being squashed against the bar by a surging crowd in Buffalo Joe's in Glasgow a few year back. I turned to the girl next to me and said "Oooft, I've not felt like this since I was in the jail!"

Class act all the way. I'm getting better, but not much.

I can only aspire to the prowess of the guy who sat next to me at registration in fourth year. One day, we arrived at class to find a new girl sitting directly in front of me. She was a stunner. Within ten seconds he tapped her on the shoulder.

"Wanna go out with me?"

She replied "no".

"How no'?"

"Because I don't know you."

"I'm Barry, wanna go out with me?"

A master at such a young age.
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Mon 14 Dec 2009, 20:59, 2 replies)

Don't do yourself down
You've plenty of promise and obviously have a decent enough sense of humour (even if drunken you strays a little way into Python territory).

The biggest step is just getting the talking going.
Just try it, even if it doesn't work out every tim/the first few times, the more comfortable you become just getting in there and starting, the easier it'll get.
(Pope Jamiroquai III, Tue 15 Dec 2009, 1:58, closed)

Those are pretty funny lines, dude!
What you need is a nice girl with a good sense of humour... the one you truly love will truly love you in return for who you are when the time comes.

In the meantime, I say keep churning out the lines and get yours.

rafter
baz
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 15 Dec 2009, 9:44, closed)