The poundland guide to getting your mate pregnant.
Not me but a friend let call her amy!
Well she wanted some condoms for the local chemist and wouldnt buy them herself because she's a big jessie so I got talked into it.

Me being a tight arsed student (tighter than a camels ass in a sandstorm !) as my next door neighbour says. Well i wouldnt pay the £3.50 price tag in the local chemist so set about sourcing some cheaper johnnies.

So while wondering round our local cheep tat shop noticed packs of condoms on sale. Bingo! So brought them and told amy she owed me 3.50 for the pack.

Two days later she comes into my flat and announces that not one, not two, but all three of the johnnies had split and now she needed a pregnancy test and would I buy it for her. Did I learn my lesson, did I fuck. Poundland pregnancy tests should do it. First one negative, second one negative, still no period, Doctors test.....positive. Oh fuck.

length around 9 months n a baby boy!
(snugglesacks, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 21:26, 7 replies)

Ummmm...
...didn't you say you're a nurse?

*cringe*

There are some things on which you never skimp.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Fri 4 Jan 2008, 21:51, closed)

lol yea i am!
I didnt realise thet were shit at putting on johnies.
I gave her some SEX ED lessons she obviouly missed in school
lol!
(snugglesacks, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 23:18, closed)

oh dear
I thought you have to wait at least 7 days before the kits can detect pregnancy.

Oh well, I bet they learned their lesson anyway ;-)
( Firkinfedup last shat on your wife's tits at, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 23:29, closed)

Wow
Well, I hope the one or two quid you robbed her of was worth it?

LOL!

Twat.
(fishyfishyfishyoooh Tonight I will be Miss Saigon, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 23:52, closed)

wow
so not only did you buy some cheapo nasty condoms because you didn't want to fork out £3.50 even though your friend was going to give it you back but you lied to her and ripped her off? And then to top it off you buy her a pregnancy test from fucking poundland?

wow I bet she never asked you to buy her anything again.
(lei, Sat 5 Jan 2008, 1:46, closed)

If you're not mature enough to handle buying condoms yourself,
you're not mature enough to handle sex. They're just barriers. Like rubber gloves so you don't get gunk on your hands. Or goggles so you don't get sawdust in your eyes.
( Bob Todd whee, Sat 5 Jan 2008, 12:31, closed)

Robbed one or 2 quid
Actually i never did get the money back but i wasnt going to argue the point cos i did by cheep condoms and pregnancy test!!
Aww well!
Im sure im going to hell anyway!!!
lol
Forgot to say look for the acidental animal cruelty story by kickstandrich. I accidentally kill her hamster as well with my 30f snugglesack (she had no clue!)
Aw well
(snugglesacks, Sat 5 Jan 2008, 16:40, closed)