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Dan Prick tugs our coat and tells us: "I'm enormously middle class, and was once dragged along to a bingo club by a former girlfriend and her mum. It's incredible the fury you can whip up in a room of old biddies winning a fuckton of money and telling them 'This is a load of old shit, really'". Like Pulp's Common People, have you ever tried to act down, or act up?
( , Thu 20 Mar 2014, 15:29)
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when i was a student, i used to work in a pub in stockport, because it was near my day job. the locals - which randomly enough included frank gilgamesh the parrot licker as it was his local at the time - thought i was posh because i was from wilmslow. so they would all sing "common people" at me whenever i started a shift.
at 18 you're all self-conscious and shy, and a chorus of 10 rowdy northerners yelling, "if you called your dad, he could stop it all, yeah" isn't funny or annoying, it's just really humiliating.
although... you know what's even more humiliating?
when the new barmaid is something of a butterface, but is a 6' blonde with a body that would make barbie weep. and elliott, the cunt who normally leads the singing, calls you over and says,
"now look swipe, you're a pretty girl. but would you fuck off so i can get a proper look at that? phwooooooar."
elliott was a cunt.
( , Thu 27 Mar 2014, 13:21, 19 replies)
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i still wouldn't do you, even with your mum's vag sliced off and strapped to my head, so.
( , Thu 27 Mar 2014, 13:24, closed)
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( , Thu 27 Mar 2014, 13:26, closed)
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did you ask your kid for advice on that one?
( , Thu 27 Mar 2014, 13:37, closed)
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i doubt it, but anything can happen
( , Thu 27 Mar 2014, 13:25, closed)
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Nobody, ever, including your parents, can ever have described you as pretty.
You fat ginger mess.
( , Thu 27 Mar 2014, 13:27, closed)
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and he didn't care which one went in the wank bank
( , Thu 27 Mar 2014, 13:54, closed)
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but every single person in Stockport should be gassed or clubbed to death.
( , Thu 27 Mar 2014, 13:45, closed)
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in practice, there are more deserving places. like redcar. or hull.
( , Thu 27 Mar 2014, 13:46, closed)
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