Thou shalt not steal
This one's been playing on my mind for years. I told the wife on Saturday and she was so disgusted, she ran off and wrote it down in her Little Book Of Things That Might Come Up When We Get Divorced.

1984: I was a terrible student, surviving on a mere fifteen quid a month before beer. Wild-eyed with starvation (having spent my allowance the previous day on a Wimpy Big Bender Breakfast), I stole a packet of rub-down lettering from WH Smiths in Bracknell. This set the retail giant back the grand sum of 35p, bringing them to their knees in the desperate hour at the heart of Thatcher's Recesssion.

Desperate to avoid any actual revision, I decided that my physics folder desperately needed jazzing up, and the only way I could achieve this was through the addition of "S. Duck, Physics" in solid black lettering.

Loitering around the store that fateful lunchtime, I chose a fine packet of lettering from the crowded stationary department, read all the magazines, thumbed through the records, programmed the display ZX Spectrum with

10 PRINT "FUCK OFF ";
20 GOTO 10

then fled to enjoy my rubby-down spoils.

And it was worth it, too. I got a Grade E.

Mr Smith: I'm so, so sorry.
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 13:28, 3 replies)

" Little Book Of Things That Might Come Up When We Get Divorced"
Haaaaaaaaahahahahaahahahahahahahaha
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 13:30, closed)

To be honest
It's quite a big book, and well into its third volume
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 13:33, closed)

Who the hell eats at Wimpy?

( kappynitty doubled your entendre on, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 14:34, closed)