dear andrea
do you remember that day when we ran into each other in the manor house? we got thrashed on cheap vodka and talked for hours. i knew there was something bothering you, but i also knew you'd tell me what it was in your own time.
after about three hours, you just seemed to crumble. the tears were pouring down your face. you told me that your marriage to terry had hit a rocky patch, despite the fact that you'd only been wed a year. you said that, just as you thought things were sorted and you were working it all out, you found out that terry had kept the flat he'd lived in before you moved in together. you suspected that he was having an affair, but as you worked most nights, you had been unable to catch him out. you'd gone to his flat and seen the lights on, but you didn't have a key and nobody answered the door. you were such a wreck, all i could do was hold you and try to comfort you.

here's what i didn't tell you.

i'd run into terry about a month earlier. he'd told me that marrying you had been a huge mistake and you were now divorced. he'd told me that you were fine with this and it was actually you that had instigated divorce proceedings. he said that he'd moved back into his old flat. he told me lots more, often while we were in bed.
yes, he was having an affair. yes, it was with me.
when i left you at the pub that night, i went straight home and phoned him. i asked him if what you'd said was true. he confirmed that you were, in fact, still married. i called him all the filthy, lying bastards under the sun and ended it there and then.

six weeks later, he left you for a checkout girl. i'm not proud of what i did, but at least i know he'd have left you even if he hadn't been with me.
i'm sorry.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 29 Aug 2010, 14:50, 6 replies)

*click*
I'd say more, but I'd rather not incriminate myself.
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Sun 29 Aug 2010, 15:31, closed)

0_0

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 30 Aug 2010, 0:36, closed)

good god!
surely this question of the week should be renamed Smash Monkeys Confessional!

you are a very naughty girl!
(Lip Up Fatty Fatty Reggae still loves BBQ food on, Sun 29 Aug 2010, 19:59, closed)

indeed i am
i'm only confessing the stuff that won't get me in serious trouble!
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 29 Aug 2010, 20:37, closed)

andrea
This one might get you into trouble with Andrea!
(justin(e), Mon 30 Aug 2010, 7:17, closed)

it would if she ever came on here
but i'm fairly sure she doesn't
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 30 Aug 2010, 15:12, closed)