Deaf and Dumb lighter sales
Okay, not one to normally post but this is one of those ones that's too good to resist.

A good mate of mine who I shall call Steve(oddly enough that's what his parents call him too), was on holiday in the canaries a couple of years ago.

One night he was in a bar with his partner and a few other tourists that he'd got matey with when in walked a young lady who proceeded to place a card on each table explaining that she was deaf and dumb, she would like the good folk of this bar to buy a lighter from her as this was how she made ends meet. My mate Steve smells a rat, he'd been conned by lookie lookie men in the past and was'nt having this at all. He told all and sundry that she was a con artist and even totted up that she must be earning in the hundreds nightly. She catches Steve's eye and quickly hurries round collecting her cards before she is well and truly rumbled.

Steve with an air of smugness, turned round and said to the assembled crowd (clearly impressed with his powers of deduction) 'well that got rid of that scamming bitch' and rather than just sit back and take the plaudits, he had one other final act to perform before being hastily headhunted to Scotland Yard. 'Watch this' says he, the girl was out of the bar which was one floor up and walking down the pavement outside. Steve took a handful of change and threw it so it landed behind her, brilliant jingle jangle noise behind her and everyone in the vicinity turned to look at the pennies from heaven.

All that is, except for one person who carried on walking another 20 yards without flinching and then started having a spectacular argument with her equally deaf and dumb boyfriend in sign language, probably wondering why she had'nt flogged anything.

Steve for his part got the evil eye from everyone in the bar and those who saw it play out from street level. Honestly, throwing coins at a deaf beggar, how low can you go?.

Length?..........never mind the quality, feel the width.
(celticmick_7, Mon 22 Oct 2007, 13:40, Reply)